A Somewhat......Interesting Jazz Story

[Iam Canadian]

I found this on Fanfiction.Net and it's the first Jazz related story I've seen that wasn't written by someone in this community. (At least, I don't recognize the person, writing style or story itself) It doesn't take pains to make itself fit in the Jazz continuity, is somewhat depressing and the author can't seem to spell Devan's name right, but it may be worth a look. As for content, it's probably nothing that couldn't be posted in our War Tavern, except for maybe a slightly graphic death near the end, but I don't make any guarantees about the author's other works. (I skimmed a couple other of this writer's stories, and this was the least disturbing story of his/her's that I saw. (I'm guessing "her")) The story actually seems to have shades of Violet's "Freedom" story as it peers into Devan's motivations a bit. It also makes the rabbits seem less innocent. Finally, it hints at one of the oddest pairings in the Jazz universe I've ever seen. I guess that's about it...oh, right. A link.
Here. (http://www.fanfiction.net/s/2110355/1/)

[Violet CLM]

I reviewed it. Curious story. I wouldn't say Devan/Eva is one of the most curious pairings, though, as they spent approximately six episodes of JJ1 together, and they both seem to like being in positions of power. There are quite possibly other similarities.

[cooba]

Devon Shell. Horray.

[Doubble Dutch]

*seconds Cooba*

[White Rabbit]

It's a very interesting story. But since JJ1 and JJ2 were both...well..."children's games" I don't think it is very appropriate. Evil turtles, good rabbits. That's all. No rabbit oppresion and no rabbit racism. It really shows the dark side of the rabbit-turtle wars. Too bad it's so short.

[Violet CLM]

But Devan's war was INSPIRED by the Tortoise and the Hare. If you read the JJ1 manual, he believes that he is in the right, and it is quite possible that he is. Besides, you've got time travel, spaceships, dark histories, dysfunctional families - Jazz is not purely a children's universe.

[cooba]

But Devan's war was INSPIRED by the Tortoise and the Hare.Therefore, Rabbits should be considered as evil.

[DoubleGJ]

And they are...

[Iam Canadian]

We can't really be sure if rabbits are in the wrong. Sure, Devan believes what he's doing is right, but so do many terrorists both in games and in the real world. "One man's terrorist is another's freedom fighter." The ingame help file describes Devan as a turtle terrorist. And anyone who leads armies to destroy rabbits, breeds rabbit eating plants (see Fanolint) and builds gigantic warships to devestate planets must have a couple screws loose. Devan may be a genius, but he may not be the most sane critter around so maybe we shouldn't trust his point of view too much. The games are from the rabbits' point of view, but we never see any rabbit interacting with a turtle except for Devan and his henchmen. So really, there's no one right answer.

[Fawriel]

And really, one shouldn't even have to look for the answer. How miserably grown up does one have to be to question the righteousness of Jazz Jackrabbit? Keep at least a LITTLE of your inner child somewhere!

...to put it more clearly, a great part of JJ2's charme comes from the story's lightheartedness and childish black and white view of evil and good. While such a view is always bad in real life, this story gives you some place to hide from always having to be intelligent and grown up. Childishness is not a wise thing to base decisions on, but a wonderful state to spend your free time in.

[Violet CLM]

The games are from the rabbits' point of view, but we never see any rabbit interacting with a turtle except for Devan and his henchmen. So really, there's no one right answer.
An old classmate of Devan was in the Intergalactic Repneck Bar, and seemed quite friendly to Jazz. I'll admit that we should not automatically assume Devan is completely in the right, especially without more evidence, but it has to be a possibility.
And, yes, Devan could have chosen a method of attack which didn't seem as evil. Oh well. He's a mad scientist. That's what they do.

[Doubble Dutch]

breeds rabbit eating plants

The large 'eating' thingies were in jars, and didn't appear to be moving. The actual enemy plants were more like shooting flowers. [and those **** blue ones!] As I remember the manual describes them as turtle food.

The ingame help file describes Devan as a turtle terrorist

It also says that 'its hard to draw a sexy rabbit' and,

'Jazz Jackrabbit:
Height: 3'1"
Weight: 90 lbs.'

Keep at least a LITTLE of your inner child somewhere!

Unquestionig ignorance has led to the largest massacres in history.

...to put it more clearly, a great part of JJ2's charme comes from the story's lightheartedness and childish black and white view of evil and good. While such a view is always bad in real life, this story gives you some place to hide from always having to be intelligent and grown up. Childishness is not a wise thing to base decisions on, but a wonderful state to spend your free time in.

Likewise, a fanfic taking this point of view is also unique in its perspective and its shades of grey. Too many fanfics these days are 'so and so goes off to defeat his old arch nemesis who has once again hatched an evil plot to destroy his race/planet/universe'

And, yes, Devan could have chosen a method of attack which didn't seem as evil. Oh well. He's a mad scientist. That's what they do.

And I quote: "What could we do agaist such blind hate? They said to us, 'speak out!' but we were strangled when we tried. Only mass rioting was an option for us, only in such a show of force could we break free.'

[ Tatyana Potapov, a russian revoulutionary after the overthrow of Tsar Nicholas II.]

[Fawriel]

*groan*
Can't I just once say something without SOMEONE ridiculing it by turning it into something completely different?
This is about a darn RABBIT GAME. With RABBITS. Notice the R, A, B, I and T.
Who says childishness equals "unquestioning ignorance" anyways? If you took some philosophy lessons, you'd find that children are in many ways actually wiser than a grown-up, and be it just because they can find beauty in much simpler things.
I'm not saying the fanfiction sucks, but I wouldn't want to read it, either, not because I like my "fanatic" point of view, but because it's a RABBIT GAME.
And if anyone cares, I spend a lot of time thinking about what is good an what is evil, and many other things. It's just nice to get a break from it all sometimes.

[cooba]

it's a RABBIT GAME.Thus, one of those rare products where you play as galactic villains' soldier of fortune.

[Anubis]

Why do I always think of bad things when I see Cooba's name?:( I'll read the story soon (if I stop being ill)

[Tubz]

The dark side of the series that was never released, that was an interesting story, put a real twist on the happy E rated game. Makes it almost into a M game.

[Nielsje]

Wow. Good story. I really like it :)

[Violet CLM]

It also says that 'its hard to draw a sexy rabbit' and,

'Jazz Jackrabbit:
Height: 3'1"
Weight: 90 lbs.'
Both are which are true. Your point?
And I quote: "What could we do agaist such blind hate? They said to us, 'speak out!' but we were strangled when we tried. Only mass rioting was an option for us, only in such a show of force could we break free.'

[ Tatyana Potapov, a russian revoulutionary after the overthrow of Tsar Nicholas II.]
Look, I know what you're saying, but there is a small difference in scale.

Mass rioting < Attempting to BLOW UP THE PLANET.
Mass rioting > Going back in time to remove one rabbit from the timeline, BUT
Mass rioting < Said time travel if the result will be taking over the planet without resistance.
(After that, it got a little more personal, and I would have to say kidnapping someone's children is a lesser offense than mass rioting. Dark Shell, on the other hand, also seems to have attempted to blow up Carrotus...)

[DoubleGJ]

My guess is that Dark Shell IS far more evil than Devan Shell. Ever since I played JJA I explained to myself that Dark murdered Lori and Eva and that's why they don't appear and Jazz isn't a king anymore. Yes, I know what's the REAL reason, but that sounds far better.

[MoonBlazE]

The moral of the Tortoise and the Hare story was not and have never been turtles versus rabbits. There are many versions of this story but the moral stays the same: Don't ever undervalue an enemy, the skin may trick.

I think this is an intersting fan fiction, just like Cobbie's old Eva story on Lori Central. It shows a bit more about the feelings of the characters that's overshaded by the famous Jazz.

[Coppertop]

Interesting indeed.

[Iam Canadian]

Of course, bringing JJA into the mix begs the question of "what happened to Devan?". The guy seems nigh indestructable: in JJ2, not only does he get shot and buttstomped dozens of times when you fight him, but he gets crushed by a giant hunk of rock and still survives for the unreleased JJ3. One could theorize that whatever he did in Hell to get his Devil Devan form also gave him immortality or something close to it, but why didn't he do anything during JJA when Jazz was busy dealing with Dark Shell?

Despite what Game Titan says, I still think it's plausible for Dark to be Devan in a new persona. They look almost identical: take Dark out of his Darth Vader outfit and he'd look quite a bit like Devan. Also, according to JJA's cutscenes, Dark and Jazz have had run-ins in the past, which could be a reference to the Devan days. I suppose one could say that Devan died of old age, but he never struck me as being particularly old; not much older than Jazz, anyway. Sure, Jazz was planning on retiring in JJA, but he could still run and gun like before, and Jazz seems to me like the kind of guy who would keep going with the intergalactic soldier of fortune stuff not necessarily because he needs the money but because he likes what he does. And of course, he was a king at one point and probably had some cash left over from that. Then again, I don't give JJA as much credit as JJ1 or JJ2 due to the fact Game Titan seems to have tossed all of Epic's storyline into the memory hole, gave us a couple bits of vague info to link JJ2 and JJA and left it at that.

[Violet CLM]

Despite what Game Titan says, I still think it's plausible for Dark to be Devan in a new persona. They look almost identical: take Dark out of his Darth Vader outfit and he'd look quite a bit like Devan. Also, according to JJA's cutscenes, Dark and Jazz have had run-ins in the past, which could be a reference to the Devan days.
The claim is that Dark Shell was supposed to have gone down with his mothership. Anyway, yes, they look alike, both being turtles of about the same build. Turns out, about half the turtles in the games have that same build. They would probably look different to turtles, but we don't really know what to look for. When the designers of the game say something, it's generally wise to trust them - for example, Carrotus does have a king, he's just never appeared.
I suppose one could say that Devan died of old age, but he never struck me as being particularly old; not much older than Jazz, anyway.
That's a good question. How old is Jazz?
And of course, he was a king at one point and probably had some cash left over from that.
Was he? There were already a king and queen, and there's no reason to believe that they both died or abdicated or whatever before he divorced Eva. It is entirely probable that he was a prince the whole time.

Moonblaze: Yes, yes, that's the moral. However, it's not the moral so much as how Devan himself interpereted it.

[Iam Canadian]

Actually, I don't remember that many turtles with Devan/Dark's build. Normal Turtles and Turtle Goons go around on all fours, Schwarzenguards are, naturally, insanely buffed up, Helmuts look like midgets, the Tanketytanktank pilots are also pretty small, those jumping guys on Ceramicus look like Schwarzenguards without the creepy eyes, the list goes on...the only ones I could say look like Devan and Dark are Rocket Turtles, Stormtrooper turtles (and they look a bit shorter, but that may be just me), Doofusguards and their golden shelled Deckstar equivalents. And it's unfair to say that ALL Doofusguards, Rocket Turtles, etc... look like Devan. After all, it's not like the developers are going to draw seperate sprites for each individual member of a heigharchy. So really, it's unfair to say that half the turtles have Devan and Dark's build, which makes the similarities between the two stronger.

[cooba]

jumping guys on CeramicusI guess still only two people know their real name, so far. ;|

[Iam Canadian]

I actually do know their real names, but the name is rather...profane. So I'm refraining from using it.

[Alex]

it seems to me that jjGBA is before jj1, if you put it there, it makes perfect sense.

~Alex

[Iam Canadian]

Backtracking a bit, it seems as if with every game Devan's plots become more and more deranged. His first scheme is, of course, to hold Eva hostage so he can gain control of Carrotus. Evil? Yes. Particularly insane? Not really. Then when Jazz shows up, he builds his Twin Mega Battleships to destroy Carrotus. Now, Devan may hate rabbits, and rabbits may not treat turtles as they would other rabbits, but blasting an entire planet? That doesn't sound like a mere "revolutionary"'s actions. Then after his defeat, he builds his time machine to go back in time to wipe Jazz from the pages of history. This is where I can see that Devan's totally lost it. Time travel is a dangerous thing, and it's very possible, even likely, that he could have caused massive damage to the time stream: all to settle a grudge. Plus there's the whole "Devan goes to Inferno and becomes Devil Devan" thing. Although we don't really learn much about this event, or when it happens (JJ2's plot in general is sketchy and doesn't make much sense. Personally, I thought JJ2's storyline was unfinished. I imagine that it was originally intended for Bilsy to be the boss of Dam Nation and for the plot to continue after that and tie up some loose ends) but it still doesn't seem very "sane". So while there may be problems between rabbits and turtles, Devan's viewpoint doesn't seem very trustworthy. Devan may see a problem, but I imagine his insanity blows it out of proportion. Which again is a strike against the "rabbits=evil turtles=good" theory.

[Violet CLM]

it seems to me that jjGBA is before jj1, if you put it there, it makes perfect sense.

~Alex
I wouldn't say that... putting JJA before JJ1 would give us the following order of events:

Jazz divorces Eva.
Jazz blows up Dark Shell's mothership, preventing him from destroying Carrotus. Dark Shell is presumed dead.
Jazz flies around on many missions for an intergalactic thing called R.A.B.T.
Jazz retires. Spaz, who was also working for R.A.B.T., also retires.
Dark Shell returns and kidnaps Jazz's girlfriend, Zoe Cottontail.
Jazz rescues Zoe Cottontail, and Dark Shell escapes.
Jazz and Zoe go out on a date.
Jazz receives a distress call that princess Eva Earlong has been kidnapped by Devan Shell.
Jazz rescues Eva Earlong, and Devan Shell escapes.
Jazz attempts to marry Eva, and Devan steals the ring.
Jazz and Spaz rescue the ring, and Devan either escapes or is crushed by a giant stone.
Jazz marries Eva.
Lori appears.

That mostly works, but there is a problem regarding love interests. Jazz can't really divorce Eva before he marries her, and Zoe Cottontail is unlikely to just disappear without a trace. Spaz's reappearance would also be confusing.


@Canadian: JJ2's story line is barely held together at all, and is quite unfinished. As for the rest of your post, I'm not sure where we're disagreeing. Yes, there is a possibility that rabbits are in the wrong, but Devan is also in the wrong based on his actions. Just because one turtle does bad things does not mean all turtles are bad, nor does it mean all rabbits are good. It is entirely possible that Devan/Dark's armies were just selected parts of the turtle population with enough hate for the rabbits to join in, while the rest of the turtles were not interested.

[Doubble Dutch]

Who says childishness equals "unquestioning ignorance" anyways? If you took some philosophy lessons, you'd find that children are in many ways actually wiser than a grown-up, and be it just because they can find beauty in much simpler things.

On the other hand, you also realise that children are born selfish unthinking rude and bratty.

Both are which are true. Your point?

Given Lori's Jazz's stated heights, the Jazz/Lori pics are WAY out of proportion, Lori should be towering over everyone else. Someone's heigh is incorrect.

Look, I know what you're saying, but there is a small difference in scale.

Indeed, but scale is little, tell the prisioners of Saddam that there are much fewer of them than Jews under Hitler, but their pain is still as great.

I explained to myself that Dark murdered Lori and Eva and that's why they don't appear and Jazz isn't a king anymore. Yes, I know what's the REAL reason, but that sounds far better.

Yes, it also avoids the possibility of Eva/Zoe conflict. [It would be interesting though.]

Of course, bringing JJA into the mix begs the question of "what happened to Devan?".

He went into retirement, then realized his pension plan was crap and started back up in the evil dictator business again.

I guess still only two people know their real name, so far. ;|

Now I'm curious...

Jazz divorces Eva.

Now where does the game say that? [Eva's mom would probbably go Devan on his tail if he tried.]

[Alex]

Now where does the game say that? [Eva's mom would probbably go Devan on his tail if he tried.]

Agree

havent really finished the jjgba game yet... so I dont really know the exact storyline... only that theres no eva, lori and devan.

~Alex

[Iam Canadian]

Game Titan told us Jazz and Eva divorced, and I don't think it's mentioned either ingame or in the manual.

[Doubble Dutch]

Berylium-8 is an unstable nucleotide that has a lifetime of about eight nanoseconds before it fisses into two helium nuclei. This is almost doubble the predicted lifetime of Jazz once his mother in law discovers his divorce plans.


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