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Jimbob
Jul 10, 2009, 01:38 PM
I just wrote this. Read it and tell me what you think:

"Never Think 'I'm Falling Down'"
No cold, hard feelings of cement while softly strolling the streets,
The souls of these nice, comfy shoes are awesome gifts to my feet.

The smallest of small little details in this world,
Are often those emotions that make you want to hurl.

On a more positive note, all of these fleeting thoughts
Are really what makes up your life, wonderful or not.

As a human species, we take so much for granted,
Even though our view on life may be a little slanted.

Understanding is made by peace and love,
So just be yourself and treat them all above.

So value this life and do all the good you can,
Even to prevent others from carrying out their evil plan.

You know, they say good deeds go very far,
Even though doing what you should may be a little bit hard.

The reign of great, free thoughts is just like a kingdom,
You really need it to understand the meaning of freedom.

Even though it may take time to recover,
Never, ever put yourself above others.

And all these warm thoughts bleeding from those wonderful minds
Are really what you need to put your fearful past behind.

The feeling of freedom is so powerful and so potent,
When you work desperately to try to invent and invent.

Just think, you may feel like crying right now
But never think "I'm falling down."

plunK
Jul 10, 2009, 05:12 PM
Hmmmm...... Very touching in a way with a really sad tone.......It somehow makes me feel as it should be the lyrics to a speed metal song

Jimbob
Jul 10, 2009, 06:42 PM
Yes I agree. It almost made me cry while writing it.

I was watching some YouTube videos on sad poems earlier today for inspiration. I haven't written a poem in a long time, so I thought why not try again? I believe I gained some new subscriptions on my list when watching those YouTube videos. I also love how it starts off with an example of what it implies.

Edit: I have now posted a YouTube video of the poem. (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3aeFI0LCG2A)