Que Passa!!!!

Uh oh- looks like this one is too big: Time for Explode-O-Vision(A system where the chapter takes two posts. I did this once before with the sequel to this story: The Bozonian Stone.)...

Spaz saves the world, all by himself with nothing but speed, wits, and a large slice of cheesecake: part 6a
The Big Cheese Meets the Big Cheesecake

Dateline: Minutes away from judgment day
Location: Running towards the main armory room, screaming like B-movie stars with a large gang of heavily armed guards hot on their heels.

ZAAAAP!
"Can't you run any faster? They're gaining on us!"
"I could... IF I DIDN'T HAVE TO CARRY YOU THREE AS WELL!!!"
"Details, details"
ZAAAAP! "YOUCH!!" Spaz ducked narrowly avoiding a laser shot aimed for his head... Unfortunately, the shot took away a small patch off of his pompadour, leaving him with a small yet noticeable bald spot right between his ears.
"Don't worry, Mr. Squaz," said 2M pointing up ahead. "There's the door to the main armory room." "Thank God for small favors!" muttered Spaz.
Kicking the door open, Spaz dropped his robot friends into a little heap in front of him and slammed the door rather loudly. After taking some time to catch his breath, he started rubbing his bald patch.
"Aww, man..." he said, rather sadly. "There ought to be some kind of 'hair club for hares' in case of situations like this." He ruffled his fur up a bit to cover the spot.
"WOW!" said 2U, coming too from all the past excitement. "You're the coolest, Spaz."
"Thanks... Where's 2M?"
"HEY, GUYS! TAKE A LOOK AT THIS!!"
Turning towards the sound of 2M's voice, the three adventurers gasped in unison. In the middle of the room was the L.I.A.R. It was about 50 feet high and if one squinted, looked, well, a LOT like a giant lava lamp.
"Whoa... I had NO IDEA the thing looked so ridiculous." Said 2R.
"Well, now that we're here, we might as well get to destroying it." Spaz said pulling out his gun and taking careful aim. Suddenly a shot came out of nowhere, hitting Spaz's fingers and making him drop his gun.
"Hello, Mr. Jackrabbit." A shadowy figure was waiting in the corner. It casually walked to the door and locked it. The bots quickly took refuge behind Spaz's skinny legs. "Glad you could make it to see the destruction and carnage."
"Who are you? How do you know my name?" Spaz said nervously. He was starting to wish he could hide behind his OWN legs with the bots.
"You could say it has to do with a close relative of yours." The figure walked into the light.
"WHAT! IT CANT BE! BRO. GOT RID OF YOU YEARS AGO!!!"
It was Zoonik.
Suddenly a large hand came seemingly from out of nowhere and enveloped Spaz's entire body. Looking up, Spaz saw that he was in the grasp of a giant 20 foot tall gorilla wearing a business suit. "Allow me to introduce you to an friend of mine." Said Zoonik with a sneer. "Ruler of the Donkongeys, King Kong Glomerate. He made me his chief adviser, and ultimately, CAPTAIN of his army."
"Wait a sec- You guys KNOW each other?" Interrupted 2R.
"Well, rather indirectly: the evil super genius turtle known as Devan Shell promised me good money to make sure that his brother never made it to his precious princess, but it turned out that little green lagomorph had to be a gun toting Speedy Gonzolase about it.- I ended up getting fried within an inch of my life. I was humiliated right on my own home planet... Nobody does that to me without consequences..."
"So..." said Kong Glomerate. "This is the brother of Jazz Jackrabbit of whom I've heard so much about." Lifting Spaz up to his eye level, he added. "As my chief adviser and captain of my fleet, Zoonik is my property. I consider it a personal matter when my property is desecrated..." Spaz gulped audibly.
Then he did the best thing he could do in his rather intimidating position: Opening his mouth as wide as he could, he sunk his teeth into Kong Glomerates pointer finger.
The giant ape screamed in pain and waved his hand wildly to try to shake Spaz off, but the plucky rabbit wouldn't let go that easily. Zoonik, sensing that his new boss was in need of help pulled out his blaster and teliported to Kong'' other hand, which the big ape moved closer to the hero hare. Spaz was too concentrated on hanging on for dear life to notice his nemesis tacking aim at his head. Zoonik pulled the trigger with deadly accuracy...
But the shot hit something else blocking the rabbit. Something that could not be seen for some reason. It made a loud crackling noise, and dropped to the floor with a clang sound, causing Kong Glomerate to stop shaking his hand in surprise. Spaz let go of the giants finger and dropped softly to the ground...
And there on the ground was the blackened body of S.O.C.K.E.T. 2U.
2R and 2M went up to their fallen brother. "Is he going to be all right?" Spaz asked hopefully. "I think so..." started 2M, "But he's definitely going to need to see a good mechanic." Suddenly the small droid moved. "Wha-what happened?" Looking up at his siblings and Spaz, a look of shock appeared on his face. "SPAZ! LOOK OUT!"
Spaz looked behind him. Kong Glomerate was about to smash Spaz with his large hand. Spaz jumped out of the way just in time to avoid it. "Terribly sorry to interrupt such a touching moment." Said Zoonik, pulling out what looked like a large remote control. "But according to my calculations, we've just arrived at Bozok and it's time to set this planetary distraction plan into action." He pushed a large button on the remote. Bright red lights started flashing around the room and an electronic and abnormally calm voice was heard. "2 minutes until the firing of the Logic Intensifier Armageddon Ray."
"It is time to admit defeat, Jackrabbit." Boomed Kong Glomerate, pulling out what looked like a large rubber stamp. "Surrender now, and I shall merely kill you, but if you continue to be stubborn, and fight, I shall wipe every trace of you out of existence."
"Why do you want to destroy these people anyway?" asked 2R. "What have they done to any of YOU guys?"
"They have disrupted the most important of movements:" said Kong Glomerate "PROGRESS! By existing, they prevent our expanding. Their low IQ makes them perfectly expendable, and the one who dies with the most, wins. Shakespeare said that." "Besides..." added Zoonik, "We're EVIL, and you don't get that position by being a softy."
Spaz reached into his pocket for his gun seconds before he remembered that he lost it when Zoonik shot at him... However, he DID find that he had something else there... Something cold and melted... in a plastic baggy... Pulling it out, Spaz found it was something he forgot about a long time ago:
It was a melted slice of cheesecake.
(Continued next post.)