Chapter two:
ONCE UPON A TIME THERE WAS A RABBIT AND HIS NAME WAS JAZZ JACKRABBIT. HE WAS A RABBIT. So he went into the mall and went up to a phone booth so he could call the fire department, but his backpack had NO MONIES in it! So, he went around searching the coin return slots on all the phone booths and found 11 cents. So JAZZ JACKRABBIT called the fire department and told them that his house was on fire, but didn't tell them where he lived because his 11 seconds were up.

So he went outside and drove his carrot car back to his house, but his house was gone! (it burnt down) So JAZZ JACKRABBIT decided to find the CONSPIRACY TO DESTROY THE PLANET. He thought and thought, and decided that he would go to THE CASTLE because if the planet was going to be destroyed, THE CASTLE would also be destroyed. (his girlfriend lived there)

ONCE UPON A TIME THERE WAS A RABBIT AND HIS NAME WAS JAZZ JACKRABBIT and he was driving to THE CASTLE in his carrot car but on the way it ran out of gas!

End chapter 2.

-=Edit=-
Violet, I found it hillarious.