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"Soldier of fortune & seeker of justice, Jazz Jackrabbit hurtles through the cosmos, performing acts of daring-do for those in need"
"We interrupt this broadcast of "Married... with chinchillas" to bring you this special bulletin... Shellian Terrorist Devan Shell has kidnapped the rabbit princess Eva Earlong... the princess was quoted as saying 'THIS SUCKS!'"
"Wow! I could be a real hero! Think of the fortune I could make on merchandising alone"
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