Propulsion and Speedy read the thingy again, to make sure they had gotten it right. No - it was indeed a sacrifice situation. "Evil Plan Cliche'..." muttered Speedy.
"Well, there's nothing to be done about it." said Propulsion. "For now, let's just go there. Maybe we'll find someone along the way who will volunteer."
Speedy nodded, and they started off to a corridor until they were interrupted by the guard screaming "LET ME LOOSE!". So they did, in return for that he remain silent about the whole thing, which he actually did.
So they started off to the corridor again, which was by some stroke of luck the right one, and came across a large machine with three tubes, reading "Shoot", "Maim" and "Hurl". There was a long pause.
"I will sacrifice myself." said Speedy, gallantly, stepping foward. Although they had asked politely of everyone they had met on the way here if they would like to end their life to save the planet they had been working to destroy, none had agreed.
"Oh, no you will not!" said Propulsion, shoving him aside. "I shall sacrifice myself!"
"In the negative!" cried Speedy, glaring. "I'm the secondary group leader, and it's always the important people who sacrifice themselves."
Propulsion glared back. "Don't you see, though? You're just falling victim to corporate propaganda! I should go. I'm a minor character no one will miss much. But you - you're a real person!"
Speedy sighed. "Propulsion, let's not go through this again. You DO have a name."
"So? I'm still not important enough to have a last name! Let me go, so you and the rest of the planet may live!"
"You think last names are that important? Look at me. Do I have a last name? Does BæÅüMÃ(-)Ñ? Does Tyf? Does Gurgi? Last names just make it confusing, as you may get referred to by your first name or your last name, and people won't recognize them as belonging to the same person!"
Propulsion paused, struck by this new thought, and Speedy rushed foward. However, Propulsion managed to catch him by the collar.
"I'm still going though."
"You most certainly are not!"
"I am too! I know all the lines and stuff! 'Tis a far, far better thing I do -"
"That doesn't matter! I am better suited to sacrifice myself!"
"Oh yeah?"
"YEAH!"
And so began the obvious fistfight, with both rabbits rolling around on the ground, managing to avoid all three deadly input tubes, and not attracting attention of any security cameras.

BæÅüMÃ(-)Ñ hid behind a large protecting object that probably hadn't been there before, and was quickly joined by Jim Drab, who was trying to figure out how to make slingstones laser proof.
"Now what?" asked BæÅüMÃ(-)Ñ, noting a section of wall next to him get burned away.
"We've got to defeat him someway, no matter what the cost!" said Jim, cornily. "Elsewise, he shall destroy the planet, and who knows what else! Not to mention, the death of Mr. Continuity shall go unavenged!"
BæÅüMÃ(-)Ñ nodded. He had heard all this before. "So, let's make a plan."
Jim Drab was silent for a moment, other then when he shifted his position from sitting on one foot to the other, so BæÅüMÃ(-)Ñ had time to think of something.
"How about this. One of us goes out to draw attention, and the other sneaks up from behind and takes him out."
"Great!" said Jim, perking up. Then, "I shall draw the attention!" he said, gallantly.
"Sounds fine to me." said BæÅüMÃ(-)Ñ. Jim gave him a hurt look, but jumped out from behind the concealing object anyway. BæÅüMÃ(-)Ñ waited a moment, then crawled around the room to the back, and waited for Blagagnga's attention to be entirely diverted.
Jim hopped around, amazingly dodging the super quick laser blasts emitted by the Hovercraft every few fractions of a second, as if he had trained to do this all his life. But his attempts were soon foiled, and a vicious blow got him through the stomach. BæÅüMÃ(-)Ñ, throat lumping without any warning, leaped up towards the hovercraft, but bounced off of a forcefield. Blagagnga turned around, and green neon letters reading "Mwahahaha!" filled the air. The laser turrets aimed at BæÅüMÃ(-)Ñ, who was laying on the floor, with not quite enough time to get out of the way.

Frang Frajine, having messed up the Tax records for his family, went looking around for new computers to mess up. Here was an interesting one.. "Easter Hovercraft Power System". Frang erased a few crucial files because the name was weird, then went back to looking.

"And now," read the green neon letters pouring from the hovercraft in an old movie syndrome, "I shall kill you as I killed that fool over there. And this planet shall die!"
BæÅüMÃ(-)Ñ grappled for his backpack of whatsit or other, but it was strapped shut, and he didn't have the time to open it.
With a sardonic smile, Blagagnga lowered his finger to the Fire Laser button.. then noticed a small flashing display reading "Power Shut Down". Then the power shut down, and the hovercraft fell straight down into the void of BoX, who was still sitting in the depression of the floor. BæÅüMÃ(-)Ñ, not staying to figure out what had happened, grabbed the still partially breathing body of Jim Drab and rushed out a sidepassage.

Propulsion and Speedy rolled about on the floor, trading blows and demands to sacrifice themselves instead. Still, they somehow noticed when BæÅüMÃ(-)Ñ ran it, with the limp body of Jim Drab in his arms. "What are you doing!?" he cried, angrily. "You're supposed to be shutting down the Planet Destroying Bomb!"
Speedy extricated himself from Propulsion, who began to roll around punching himself, not noticing the absence of opponent. "Well, you see, to shut it down, someone must enter the machine, alive, of their own free will. And we're fighting for the chance to go in."
BæÅüMÃ(-)Ñ frowned, and thought for a bit. "Hmmmm... yeah, I can see your point of view.. hey, wait!" He turned to Jim, who was still alive, though rapidly declining. "Jim! Do you want to save the species named after you as your last, dying action?"
"Is... Blagagnga.... dead?" rapsed Jim, struggling to get out each word.
"As far as I can tell." said BæÅüMÃ(-)Ñ, looking down.
Jim Drab's face broke into a smile. "Then.... yes."
BæÅüMÃ(-)Ñ lifted the body of the head of Plotline Hotline, and before he could die on them, threw him into the "Hurl" input tube. There was a brief silence, and then;
"Danger! Danger!" cried a voice based alarm system, heard throughout the 'factory'. "The Planet Destroying Bomb has been compromised! As a result, the factory will self destruct in ten minutes. Do not forget to update your Resume'."
The three looked at eachother, then hurried down the passage to the fork where they had left their travelling companions battling the Nostrils.
They reached the place in very little time, and I'll kindly describe the sight that met their eyes. Six of the seven Nostrils were laying on the ground, apparently dead. The seventh was aiming a very dangerous looking weapon at the good guys, who were all huddled together in a huddle. BæÅüMÃ(-)Ñ , who had opened his backpack as they ran in case of need, grabbed his blaster and a cartridge of Freezer ammo, and shot the Nostril dead on. It froze in mid aim, and after all the congratulating and what not were done, BæÅüMÃ(-)Ñ directed the construction of a cart to carry the frozen body on. All in all, to spare you the fast running scene you've seen a zillion times in movies, they all made it out of the 'factory' one second before it caved in on itself. The BoX had already left in the postal van, so everyone worth worrying about was taken care of. Panting, 'Ares' turned to BæÅüMÃ(-)Ñ. "What do you want with that Nostril, anyway?"
BæÅüMÃ(-)Ñ smiled. "Once we get home, if the 'Tavern gets rebuilt, we'll need something for Cannibal Feud, right?"

The King was sitting in his chair, playing a nice, leisurely game of Three Dimensional chess, when a messenger burst in. "Your highness! The Gods and their followers have returned, victorious!"
The King quickly rose from his chair, and ran out, not waiting to take his turn. The opponent sat in his chair, waiting paitently. Of course, King boy had already known of the sucess of the mission, as otherwise the planet would have been so many cosmic particles by now, but it he looked foward to congratulating the heroes nonetheless.
Soon, they met in the Main Chamber. The leader of the Divine Army of Ares appeared to be missing, but other then that, they were just as cool as the first time he had met them in this chamber. And now they had saved the planet.
"You are just as cool as the first time I met you in this chamber." said the King, graciously. "And now you have saved the planet."
"Yes, your majesty." said most of the group, except those who said things like "Yeah.". "But BæÅ- the God of Wisdom did most of the work." said that Zealot.. what was its name? Ah yes, Propulsion.
"None the less, you have all doubtless done great deeds of heroism. And due to the recent increase of money in the treasury, we have sufficient funds to bestow upon each of you a reward.... unless, of course, you need none?" he said, almost hopefully. The treasury had been in a sad state for some time, and to lose the recent surplus....
"Sire, we require no reward, having already the knowledge that you and your people are safe." said the God of Wisdom, looking wise. "But now we must take our leave from your planet. If you are again in times of need, we may return, but for now our task is ended."
And suddenly, they had all vanished, except Patrian, who stood dumbfounded, whispering something on the order of "They WERE gods!"

Back on the Plotline Hotline ship, Propulsion was congratulated for his mass teleportation beam, and everyone strapped down, and they all blasted off of the planet of the Drabians. At last they would return to Carrotus, and the wreckage of the War Tavern. Oh well. Nothing was perfect.