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JCF Éminence Grise

Joined: Jul 2002

Posts: 12,275

Radium is an asset to this forum

Sep 29, 2007, 08:08 PM
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Oh, right, this exists.

I tried having a slightly optimistic outlook on life by considering everything that was going in my favor. For instance, I could probably solo anyone in the group, meaning that if we were stuck down here for a while, I'd outlast everyone else. It would also provide me with a relatively steady source of food, and I don't think it would be cannibalism, since none of us were really the same species... I think. Just to be safe, I'd start with Fooruman, then go onto Araches, then Uberbob, then Faw. I'm not entirely sure the ethics of things like that. It's a pity we couldn't find Leetzan, though, because I think everyone would agree both that she's a separate species and probably tastes the best.

Mm. In any other adventure, that mental image might hurt your appetite.

Anyway, I focused on the issue at hand: defeating Dreadlord Blackraptor so I could leave these people forever. "We should go back to the machine with the inset claws," I suggested, "maybe we could crowbar them open and find a way to make the machine operate." I began to march along the pipe, but couldn't help but notice that everyone but Uberbob was simply staring at me, dumbfounded.

"What?" I asked, wondering what was wrong with everyone.

Araches had a note of pity in her voice. "Shuri, you just said you found fully-stocked living quarters, with a bed."

"And food," Faw added.

I could hardly believe I was saying this, but: "I'm hungry too, but we ate just yesterday."

"That's what I keep telling them!" Uberbob exclaimed.

Araches strode over to me and placed a hand on my shoulder. She looked me directly in the face, her troubled eyes gazing directly into mine. Then, with her other hand, she proceeded to slap me heavily across my face. Part of me suddenly realized that I deserved that, and part of me was slightly relieved it wasn't a friendly shoulder-touch. Before I could think much about it, though, I noticed everyone but me and Uberbob were sprinting (or rowing) towards the cave.

"If it makes you feel better, Shuri, I think crowbarring the boxclaw is a really good idea," Uberbob said. I used my limited sign language knowledge to explain to him what his caring meant to me, and continued after the rest of the party.


The cavern room was a bit cozier with the heat from the pipes directed to it. When Uberbob and I got there, Araches and Fawriel were busy taking stock of the contents of the refrigerator while Fooruman, still sitting in his canoe, was rapidly typing something on Blackraptor's computer. I considered interrupting him to type more random keywords into the command prompt, but he looked wholly engaged in whatever he was doing. Food seemed more interesting at this point anyway. "Fawriel, status report on rations?"

Fawriel was holding a stack of frozen boxes. "Two lasagnas, fettucini alfredo, and some self-packaged meat labeled 'Former Enemies'... let's not eat that one. I guess Araches can thaw the rest of these with her sorceressism."