I think it's because the comments aren't constructive; most comments are, as said, along the lines of 'w00t great chapter!' What I'm after is criticism, what I did right, what I did wrong, how I can improve things and such. I'd do comments like that but I don't feel qualified to critique other's writing.


*Chapter 17: Contrasts*

The gun lay in two pieces, neatly cut in half, one still being held by the rather surprised rabbit that had hefted it. Erst had moved fast, and silently, there was a brief pause as the group considered their next move. Erst didn't give them long enough, a deceptively slow kick caused the first rabbit to double over, the second was taken out by a sold punch to the jaw, and the third, unexpectedly, was downed just before firing by Trixi smashing a large old, and rather heavy bottle over his head. She then bent down and rifled through their pockets.

Schrock stared at the scene while everything settled into place. He wasn't quite used to this level of excitement and therefore his mind took that much longer to accept what had just happened. He ate another cigarette. "Erst, I think you can keep that sword for the time being and umm, Tr- uh, what do they call you anyway?" Trixi looked up from the wallet she was leafing through with the look of someone who's been caught stealing from the cookie jar. "Wha-? Um, mostly 'Hey you' or 'Rabbit' I don't think I get addressed personally much." Schrock sighed. "Right, well, whatever. Err, what are you doing to him now?" Trixi didn't look up from where she was crouched over the prone figure. "If he doesn't have enough cash or credit cards to make this worthwhile then at least I can take something the dentists will pay good money for, and if you're giving me some sort of look stop it now; I've got to pay my bills like anyone else."

Schrock turned away and went back inside, deep down he knew that sooner or later something like this would happen again, you just couldn't trust this place, as soon as you found something enjoyable it'd dump so much crud on you, you could sell yourself as fertilizer. He went back to the accounts, accounts were easy, they just sat back and got worked out, no arguments or difficulties whatsoever. Outside Trixi continued her pilfering. "Okay, what do we have here Mr... Quist... Dear lord! Does nobody carry cash these days? Okay then, open wide, this is really gonna hurt..."

* * *

Marco sat back and sipped his coffee; it was stone cold, figured. Maybe there was a donut left- no, apparently there wasn't. He sat back again and twiddled his fingers. (-), there was never anything to do in the afternoons. He looked out the window at his partner who was lying half asleep under a tree. Technically it wasn't any way to catch criminals, but then again, there were none to catch this far from civilization. To compensate they'd been given a large patch of countryside to patrol, but that still didn't change anything. He stepped out of the car and headed toward his prone partner, he could amuse himself by placing various items of vegetation upon her sleeping person and taking a picture; he averaged about two a month, and they always got a giggle on the precinct, Sidera mustn't mind, otherwise why would she let him do it so often? The roads out here were terrible, potholes everywhere he mused, picking himself up from a sprawled position. They really sh- (*!)

Marco picked himself up from the muddy ditch he'd flung himself into and watched the hoverboards zoom into the distance. Sidera was up and looking around wildly, Marco yelled at her to get into the car; there was no way they'd been doing the legal limit, they didn't look like they had licenses and they'd tried to run him down, which was a big mistake. The years of active duty were burned away under the adrenalin and he executed a perfect flying leap into the car, suffering only a nicked ear. Sidera was already in and buckled up, and seconds later they were speeding after the group, sirens blaring.

Wit looked disdainfully at the fresh green countryside and spat, where it landed the grass died. "Geez, all this waiting and planning and stuff and all we get to do is ride a few hundred miles? It's never as spectacular as you imagine, I mean, there's all the fun afterwards; but I wish the actual duty was more impressive!" There was a blaring behind them as a police car started to gain on them; Red gave the others an almost pleading look. "Please can I handle this one? Please?" Wit grunted "Why? You've had your fun, let me handle this!" There was a pause, then the pursuing car started to cruise to a halt, its siren spluttering to a slow halt; various pieces fell off of it, the windscreen cracked and its two occupants sprawled onto the road, unconscious. Red scowled "You guys have all the fun!"