Quotes Archive
583 quotes in the archive

583. "I've molded gelatin to completely close off my anus, but now my armpits are leaking brown onion-egg smelling syrup shit" -Spaztic
582. "Also, palindrome kind of sounds like alladin... but completely different." -CrimiClown
581. "Look at how many people die in the real world today whether it's from abortion to murder to whatever." -drmoo
580. "i'd let google invade my integrity any day of the week" -iCeD
579. "job hunting is the worst kind of hunting because it doesn't involve spears." -Trafton
578. "conclusion: i do not to live in nigger." -Trafton
577. "He even has facial hair. He'd make one real ugly chick." -n0 (about Black Ninja)
576. "HB EvilMike! You get.... older." -Pako
575. "It’s not as if I would spend any more time dedicated to this community just to have it pinned down by a couple of negative admins whose opinion weight more than stone." -Moonblaze
574. "not as if I would spend any more time dedicated to this community just to have it pinned down by a couple of negative admins whose opinion weight more than stone." -It’s
573. "Art student? We don't need to start throwing insults." -Radium
572. "Hahahahahahahaha. Sterotypes. Materialism. Archetypes. No free will, along with an inescapable destiny." -FireSworD
571. "are you a full-time idiot or is it just a hobby?" -R3ptile
570. "I have no desire for my dopaminergic vesicles to reverse their flow and cause permanent destruction of catecholamine production ability." -Krezack
569. "my crotch is named melinda" -Trafton
568. "If I wore jingly things when I shaked my hips, I wouldn't mind being called jingly-butt." -Monolith
567. "i see your 17" HUGE CRT and raise you a 21" HUGE HUGE CRT" -Torkell
566. "added a quote by my favorite male korean pop singer, Rain. It's a tribute to him. "Endless effort, endless endurance, and endless modesty". He is the most influential person of this century by TIME 100. almost becoming a manga." -Bboy Type7
565. "Just because you're a racist, you're a racist." -BBoy Type7
564. "I am heavily deinspirated right now" -Eigus
563. "I doubt you could shove a pot brownie up your ass and feel anything except a strong desire to shit it out" -Tik
562. "While Sheldon's somatotypes are slightly outdated, I'm an ectomorph." -Krezack
561. "Beauman only wants children to experience pregnancy." -Duckbread
559. "lol" -DethMan
558. "Selling the game is just the companies/business's way to make money." -Bboy Type7
557. "Anyway, I kind of figured dicks were transported by crate" -Strato
556. "That would be killer awesome." -iCeD
555. "You insult me, my cold-blooded acquaintance." -Fjolsvidr
554. "i for one cum on my plants if they're looking down" -Tik
553. "smarter people are much more cautious about having a family whereas your average dumbass is like "lol fucking whoops a baby rofl"" -Tik
552. "No she got on later and we started talking I told her I "want things to work out between us" and she's like "me too" Then she left shortly afterwards she's like aww i g2g i'll ttyl sorry and i'm like it's ok <3 ttyl and she's like <3 ttyl and with that she left. (not an exact quote, just a synopsis)" -drmoo
551. "Ah. Hello, Descartes--but I can tell you haven't made it to the Fifth Meditation yet." -paul
550. "Lets talk about women. They like to fuck with you quite a bit, don't they? By that I mean they like to mess with your mind." -drmoo
549. "what a beauty female :D" -Majorek
548. "that's like saying you'd rather get your shoulder impaled by an icepick than your genitals" -iCeD
547. "It would be pretty sweet to have a president named Mike's Cock." -iCeD
546. "I see a possible life exists. Now I will commit suicide for efficiency." -Krezack
545. "I don't like the term "douchbag". Most douches use a squeeze bottle, not a bag. If they said "enema bag", it would make more sense." -Ninjapixie
544. "Last I checked we can still say crap. Be thankful for that, as it should be blocked." -Zapper
543. "no I don't know nothing, I just went into a computer shop and asked a guy to post on jj forums for me. I offered him a blowjob in return. I am planning on buying some internets, to burn them on cd's but I am afraid that the AOL police will get me." -sedthh
542. "'Gentlemen' are sexist." -fjolsvidr
540. "IF cobbi's parents == awesome THEN cobbi's parents != parents ELSE paradox()" -FjolsvidrFH
539. "I hate the establishment" -NovaStarCC
538. "death will die on Oct. 21,2100 (in 93 years) Reason: looked suggestively at a sword carrying Japanese guy" -Tickbot
537. "If you were funny i'd be like "no way! ha ha ha ha!" but you're not funny so i'm just like "(sarcastic)ha ha ha ha! (/sarcastic) no!"" -drmoo
536. "Back before guns people fought with swords and shields and bows and arrows and I liked that because it took strength and courage to go up against people back then. Now adays, you have some fat lard who sits on a chair and if i country gives us trouble he hits a button and a bombs drop. It's a test of trigger fingers now adays not a test of strength and training." -Drmoo
535. "i got in a fight with a black guy earlier, neither of us won or lost but he was tryin to make me call me gf and tell her i cheated on her with like 10 guys and i almsot got my ass gangbanged.... which is pretty fucked up, i can fuckin handle my own girl problems.... fuck" -ninja
534. "Its just that your eyes shine like jewels prolly because of some camera lightning anyway." -The Emperor
533. "This community lost his spirit years ago. Bashing each other on their heads is the only thing that is important here." -Shadow
532. "Wy cant every1 just appreciate all God has done 4 us, instead of criticising Him? Why cant we all live in peace? Except Jews and Arabs." -fstdt.com
531. "Anyway, they're just 4chan people, it's not like they matter." -Radium
530. "anal molestation is bad customer service :(" -Trafton
529. "i think we should have a constitutional ban on nigger" -Trafton
528. "trafton is great company when he showers" -MaGoo
527. "Iced is a language and what is the most out of it, and it's just plain gay! Ps if you're wondering i am not gay/bi. I am a frequent lover of people hacking my mammaries innocently." -Duckbread
526. "I probably should not try to see what I can fit in my mouth" -Monolith
525. "I'm a expert in computers but it doesn't matter because I'm still able to have good social relationships." -FreeFull
524. "that's not logic that's biologic which is completely different. And if you think about it the numbers all stay the same due to the law of conservation of mass." -Drmoo (on...who cares?)
523. "The reason it would be undefined is because division is like dividing something" -Drmoo
522. "the back of my ear is covered with smut" -Trafton
521. "if i had a girlfriend i'd call her yak lips, or maybe rat testicles." -Trafton
520. "i am sorry but it's time for someone to tell the truth in your faces" -R3ptile
519. "I do not support gays/bi's and I don't think it's what god intended for mankind (that's probably why AIDS started), but I mean even if you are gay, keep it private. Don't go telling the whole world you're gay. It makes a bigger issue out of it, and it's just plain gay! PS If you're wondering i am not gay/bi. I am straight all the way. And i'm bringing sexy back!" -Drmoo
518. "Proper education about skin difference in schools, proving how a black person is just as natural as any white or near-white person by interviews, documentaries and such, that is the way that makes people think better." -MoonBlazE
517. "I have nothing against homosexuals or bisexuals. In fact, I know many great ones very well. But I will steer clear of drugs and underage drinking." -Trafton
516. "But the emulators wouldn't exist if it was illegal, would they?" -drmoo
515. "I should start trying to drink coffee. I desperately need to be a man! D=" -Xobim
514. "Gigantic space penises are the best" -Haikz
513. "*crunch* Hmm...tastes like cock. :(" -Strato
512. "dimensions are an illusion" -Monolith
511. "Maybe the world has just 3 dimensions? (from our point of view, at least)" -ny00123
510. "There can only one good MS. MSpaint." -Iconguy
509. "yeah this is probably the studliest channel on #jj2" -Ninja
508. "Caps = big boobs" -Mazinkaiser
507. "is ninja watching a movie of his cousin jacking off in his grandmothers bedroom?" -EvilMike
506. "Ninja I think you should upload your penis on J2O" -MaGoo
505. "that's a cow, they're supposed to have nose nipples" -iCeD
504. "I'm like the gayest fucking dude on earth then." -n00b
503. "Although I didn't have a douche so I'm pretty much slumped in my chair with my ass sticking towards the ceiling with a funnel" -Spaztic
502. "The guy on the screen was all "The aliens are coming! The aliens are coming!" So SlaYo hit pause." -noob
501. "I said FUCK YOU GUYS. Triangle makes me think of a wobbly H only with the dude in the middle and the two girls on him." -Ninjapixie
500. "if u got aids and u sneeze u could also bring others the decease" -Shaney
499. "better beeing an addict to life then an addict to anime" -Shaney
498. "Unprotected sex baby ;)" -Strato
497. "Yee-haw, I'm gonna drive my chevvy down to the diner and meet with some of my buds, then I'm gonna kill some negroes!" -Alister
496. "my parents have a habit of relocating liquids" -Trafton
495. "Sri Lanka? That’s cool country!" -Bjarni
494. "Apple mine sticky :-#" -Bjarni
493. "Wow, I like Roller Coasters! It´s just like one Rooler Coaster in Tean City! ;)" -Bjarni
492. "stool, blacklisted" -Trafton
491. "this is a pic of my friend, who i made invisible, and put him in fire. he isn't being consumed, but so many people are consumed by sin and evil, its stupid. they turn invisible." -wwjdjudson
490. "i have no clue what he talks about, but i'm sure that if you play it backwards you'd hear satanic ritual poems" -Pyromanus (about Bjarni's YouTube videos)
489. "when iCeD and I have cyber sex we try to make it so realistic that we send eachother viruses over IRC" -MaGoo
488. "i think the role reversal is the result of the constant DNA exchange between iCeD and i" -MaGoo
487. "would you like peas or corn? Sign here" -Evilmike
486. "anything above 5 inches is monstrous" -cooba
485. "How about you upload your dick into my ass, iCeD." -MaGoo
484. "I should upload a picture of my dick to a wikipedia page just to gague the reaction" -iCeD
483. "Plus my brother and sister only have a gothic lolita party. Then i would never get interesting roles." -Duckbread
482. "id totally discover the pleasures of anal sex with a bald mono" -Excabus
481. "Haha no. My bed is about babies, not excabus." -Duckbread
480. "Knock knock. Who's there? The police. The police who? The police man." -EvilMike's brother
479. "gay stuff is usually the tastiest" -Spaztic
478. "nudity never leaves us, it is always hiding behind doors and under clothes." -Ninjapixie
477. "Mike's proverbial strap-on can penetrate any orifice, I'm afraid." -Spaztic
476. "the senior class in my skin is madddd stuck up though" -Lark
475. "i have made it clear to iced that i prefer my lubricant all natural" -MaGoo
474. "i am willing to see iced naked" -MaGoo
473. "Thus those pants have to take out piercings and get my hair out of the skin off the top of your head sideways. Then look at it. Then turn your head sideways. Then look at it. Then turn your head and let the hair in back grow long. You'll have a small penis." -Duckbread
472. "i am a homosexual with an uncombed nerd fetish" -Trafton
471. "its just another day the govermount get your money honestly im surprissed there isn’t a cristmas 2 yet." -Jamster (on Valentine's Day)
470. "I should be doing meth but I'm just slacking off :|" -VelK
469. "i just confused aftershave for mouthwash" -Trafton
468. "Bisexual guys just need to flip their girlfriends over" -AstroniA
467. "Not to offend, but you really take critic very hard, and you really change your opinions to what others say. :(" -Olsen
466. "Peach SO wants bowser cock" -Alister
465. "My breasts do not have elbows >:|" -Ninjapixie
464. "When the pH level of your jews goes down too far they become hassidic. :(" -Violet
463. "Sauron was totally a jew. DID HE HAVE A FORESKIN? I think not." -Alister
462. "EvilMike's pectoral muscles are very toned and shiny. Like the glossy part of wood." -iCeD
461. "spices make me hot" -FrankQ
460. "I think briefs are the ideal crotch covers." -FoD
459. "What you're asking is like a hamburger. You've got the buns, but where's the beef?" -Anaiyu
458. "Dalspots thinks masturbation is adorable." -Tickbot
457. "wt hell" -Tublear
456. "I didn't think u all looked at porn, thought it was mostly me and xion. i don't do it as much as i used to though" -Tublear
455. "and they are almost at the age of profanity, if there is any" -Tublear
454. "mike carl kloster doesn't sound very canadian" -Aegis
453. "My genitals change at will" -Spaztic
452. "I don't know.. strato is pretty hot." -Monolith
451. "this one looked pissed off when I hit it" -iCeD
450. "The first time I smoked a cigarette resulted in losing my virginity" -Spaztic
449. "I have a few spare bananas, want one???" -iCeD
448. "There are no good quotes on #jj2 irq. Everything is flaming. Perhaps I will find something on another irq channel." -Tublear
447. "I fling my meat in blinding rage." -Ahat
446. "in our final battle we will merge... into one big slab of sex" -iCeD
445. "Hi, I am looking for a painting job. I was painging Hotal and house. I can paint very nice and smoot. And I can use any kind of painting tools. If you are interesting, please reply to me." -Banya Min
444. "I could be the lesbian if someone is willing to take my place as gaylord" -Velk
443. "i've "considered" sleeping with people who i've never even heard talk" -Trafton
442. "come here little boy and suck my nipple as I hold this boquet" -Spaztic
441. "there is plenty wrong with the male body though" -Fquist
440. "Rub faeces on your face whenever possible" -Alister
439. "family circus warms my heart and barfs my laugh" -Trafton
438. "I give myself corn syrup enemas" -Spaztic
437. "Last night I dreamed my cock was a giant tri-masted Spanish galleon." -Evan Stone
436. "Twat is like a laser beam. Cunt is like an atomic bomb." -Cobbi
435. "look at those manboobs jiggle" -Monolith
434. "I have slept with.. 9 people from this community ;l" -Monolith
433. "I get a milk buzz after a single beer" -Spaztic
432. "So this is what the inners of a Pixi look like..*pokes the pinkness*" -Dalspots
431. "this is the fourth time this month someone i know has peed on their computer accidentally" -Trafton
430. "I need to stay awake to see Cobs lick me tonight." -FoD
429. "alcohol has more fun than starbucks." -Ninjapixie
428. "Girls don't want you to be talking to them because they have a vagina." -Trafton
426. "the dick is a great place to put a face." -Ninjapixie
425. "The porn is too old to eat" -Trafton
424. "I'll bet Link has areolas the size of soda cans." -Strato
423. "I wish I had a penis on my body so I could be on the news" -Trafton
422. "Most of my burns have nothing to do with porn" -iCeD
421. "I enjoy dancing, eventhough I don't go out a lot. Like someone said earlier, slowdances are my favourite aswell =D. (especially naked, in a candle lit room^^.)" -Grytolle
420. "my hand sometimes smells like pre-ejaculation" -aegis
419. "AFAIK Internet was invented in 1995, no idea if that's right, but around then at least." -Innocent
418. "Is this going to contain (-)? (Or not, because I read somewhere (-) make games too easy or SP levels to easy).." -CoolSoldier
417. "I want companionship...I want to meet you...you will come to meet me...I want not any of the sex of male and female...I only want to rest..." -Jarom Alan Blackmon
416. "I had to unbutton my penis." -Trafton
415. "What did the truck driver say when he couldn't find his truck? "I can't find my truck."" -EvilMike's brother
414. "ar you Speek english? some one? i Looking For Gaters in canada can you Help Me?" -bl0z (in #canada)
413. "...I would've almost said "I've got to get out more", but when "outside"'s referring to other online forums, you know something's not right." -Fawriel
412. "Something on my face is bleeding. BBL." -VleKa
411. "I've always wondered why they don't put meat in breakfast cereals.." -White Rabbit
410. "Way to job!!!" -Trafton
409. ""Aren't You" is pronounced nearly the same as "Aren't You"" -Trafton
408. "Say hello to my little friend." -Cuban Jesus
407. "You can ban me for the rest of the year: do you seriously think #jj2 will last two weeks without me?" -Xion (in 2003)
406. "this isnt hilarious like seeing ur brain" -Kakashi
405. "ppl fall from top of building in ur country after seeing u after ur gf" -Kakashi
404. "If I wasn't feline, I could do that too. (The no sleeping part)" -Xion
402. "And also more likely to rape our GAY" -Tickbot
401. "Corvette! yAy! Good juice." -Spaztic (2001)
400. "Which is why I have to butter up my cock for iCeD" -MaGoo
399. "i'm italian it's fantastic idea,and after 5 year i can take my driving licenze back thanks whizzi and everybody and thanks internet" -stefano
398. "And you can't practace kissing your hand cos it doesn't kiss you back, so you do all the work, and then you get into a wrong habbit." -Michael
397. "omg 10 years old and u allready look like a ghost" -Shaney
396. "You see, America houses the most satanists in America." -n00b
395. "Nobody ever accused Wakeman of bias though :'(" -FQuist
394. "I'm in alot of movies" -Christopher Walken
393. "Unfourtantly for UF, crashing doesn't give him a bigger Penis" -Blacky
392. "Mr Rogers probably porked a ton of girls who loved his show" -iCeD
391. "I bet Bill Gates never gets laid even though he is married" -iCeD
390. "ive collected pure grandmas essence to make the greaetest cake in history" -trixisowned
389. "that was three cups of granulated retarded and a tablespoon of genius" -Captain Canuck
388. "I think Lori is a masculine bunny with fire in her blood!" -Spongie W
387. "I want play-dough to come out of my penis." -MaGoo
386. "and ur mom is a slot" -SkulL
385. "iCeD, if you ever lose your virginity I want you to record it." -Magoo
384. "I'd like to hear iCeD having sex." -Magoo
383. "are you naive or just from another planet?" -Michael
382. "sexurity through obscurity is generally a bad idea indeed" -StijnP
381. "New Xbox Scrotum with Yak Ass Technology." -Trafton
380. "Going to church doesn't make you a christian at all, just like going into McDonalds doesn't make you a hamburger..." -MacAddict111
379. "Didn't your mother ever tell you not to flash in public, Wheeler?" -Captain Planet (When a camera flash blinds him)
378. "banning me would be a violation of the law" -MRabbit iT
377. "NO NAKED JELZE" -Trafton
376. "Britney is very breasts" -Gabu (during psychobabble)
375. "In an official statement, President Bush had this to say about the tragedy: "That's fun over safety."" -Tickbot rsg 87
374. "Samatros played 'CLITMANIAQ' for 69 points." -Games.com
373. "and if i penetrate" -xTM K!d
372. "night Spots THE INTERNET SISTA" -Tickbot
371. "Possible spellings for tittar: tit tar" -monobot
370. "it's gonna take a while to find the sketch. didn't realize I had unfinished smut in my folder." -Dalspots
369. "sweat pants are way too revealing i feel like a male whore" -Captain Canuck
368. "i be going to hunt some negros with my cowboy pistol!" -Michael
367. "I have the body of an eighteen year old. I keep it in the fridge." -Spike Milligan
366. "'Did you come here for the Jazz Jackrabbit meeting?' 'I find pleasure in death.'" -SlaYo
365. "Opossums are the worst animals to meet when you're alone in the woods, Especially if they look at you for a bit and then do that Exorcist head turn thing" -n00b
364. "Remember kids! How faster your download how bigger your penis is!" -[CB]Ins0mnia
363. "When i'm 18, i'm gonna d/l sooo much porn" -exodus
362. "Hey, I'll call you right back, I hate talking to people while I take shits." -DJ
361. "usually gusy dont mind when i hot on them ;|" -<Ri>
360. "orbitz is a teenage raper who rapes girls and intetrent" -Shaney
359. "ok u surprised me, a need sex now can u help me" -knicula17 (#canada query)
358. "Sarahgirl was sexually harassing me by /msging me." -UNKOWNFILE
357. "Tacos are like an orgasm in your mouth." -Keyrsten
356. "Next time you see an emo kid walking down the sidewalk, ask them why they're not walking in the middle of the road." -Magoo
355. "I was blessed by an ancient and mysterious priest when I was young and it protects me from all harm. That includes going to chatrooms when retarded people are in them." -Radium
354. "I was tempted to vote on option 3. I went with option 2, this isn't really highly debatable. But I belive that I grew up with my siblings, parents, etc, not the birds and chickens and other animals and nature." -Tublear (in reply to nature vs. nurture)
353. "But it makes me think, how do the greek Gods feel about having things put up their butt" -Tublear
352. "its not fiun to do racistics baby" -shaney
351. "the siZe doesnt matter its the hammer your throwing it at" -shaney (on penis size)
350. "Do you realize how fun it would be to go outside on a cloudy night with no moon and just.. pee?" -Lark
349. "I recently came to know that Chippie is slang for "street hooker"" -ChippieBW
348. "diarrhea is in every medicine." -MaGoo
347. "Fun Over Safety, but wear a condom and get both!" -Foxfulness
346. "if i am amish i should make a pc work out of poo wood straw and make a joystick out of a cow cock" -shaney
345. "you know ladies mostly are these rich crappy people that talk like they have a hot patao in theire throat so we now know what lady_croft is" -shaney
344. "Gay sex is such a pleasure" -Shaney
343. "I'm tempted to draw something cute and nekkid at the same time." -Dalspots
342. "all of you in here pussy" -Skull
341. "trafton is a nazitrafton" -SkulL
340. "people stab their fucking father in here" -SkulL
339. "Bacon just fades from your mind." -Ninjapixie (on kosher)
338. "Who the fuck would want to download porno movies on a Linux." -Moonblaze
337. "the american army is no more then nothing with their nigger bullies" -SkulL
336. "there are niggers in california" -SkulL
335. "i will cut dick and stuck it up ass and then i will send it your family for dinner" -SkulL
334. "on my left leg its is thanksgiving on my right is Xmas but in the middle is easter so you can search some easter eggs" -Shaney
333. "I bet it's about as hot as lesbian sex between Margeret Thatcher and Janet Reno." -iCeD
332. "I bet everyone there will either be prettier or less pretty than me." -Larks sister
331. "your pretty dumb or stupid if you didn't vote for men. If you didn't then get awake from your prefect world..." -Shadow (on men vs. women)
330. "when dalsie sometimes travels to netherlands she travels thru time lol" -KeeK02005
329. "what makes you think linking park is metal? they're like an emo-pop/punk band." -Michael
328. "I try to keep the amount of long and pointy things in my pants to an absolute minimum." -Guybrush Threepwood
327. "i shall go have myself a big BONER!" -Disguise
325. "You can make tilesets good, or bad. It's your choice." -Cooba
324. "I'M NOT A SPREAD SHEET!" -Xion
323. "Sometimes my underpants turn brown." -Xion
322. "...Cretin. Shut the fuck up asshat." -Xion
320. "Well, even though I'm against gay marriage, I don't turn myself into a racist or anything." -Tublear
319. "If I wanted your opinion, I'd shove it down your throat." -GenEX
318. "This armor really shows off my Ass. :)" -FoD (meaning assassin)
317. "Axie's damned stick is thick" -Tickbot
316. "Funny how I have 3 internets." -Blackraptor
315. "Is that metric or standard?" -Trafton (when asking about a percentage)
314. "Used needles, Mormonism, and information about your bathroom use are all things you shouldn't share." -Trafton
313. "Judging others is easier behind a leather chair." -Odin
311. "I am really bored to Finland because of it's stupid neighbourhood everywhere! I wanna move somewhere where human can live wisely like to Japan or England. Or New Zealand or Lithuania." -Ninjajazz
310. "Well, I am pubertscent as you notice (or not) and I want to move England!!!!" -Ninjajazz
309. "I am living my life for Douglas." -Bunnies
308. "lol only arabics explode" -SkulL
307. "Fucked hockey puck sucked hockey puck suck fucking truck" -Tickbot
306. "I dream about women i meet. Especially female ones." -Slayo
305. "Canadian foot is weird" -Trafton
304. "i would enjoy to lick your faces" -greshi009
303. "Get lost! I'm not joking! [size=extreme big]GET LOST!!!!!![/size]" -Bjarni
302. "* iCeD can't resist the mating calls: has a craving for cock. (Est. time of return: 0secs)" -iCeD
301. "well spaztic you know thats sad high IQ but cant read without punctuation i can read every thing how worse hand writing it is i can read it cause i am the type of person that wants to understand it like people that are handicapped and cant talk that clearly and allmost no one understands them i can understand them cause i want to your just too lazy to not have the abbility to it" -Shaney
300. "Lack of new blood to the veins kills the heart, aka the JCF. Seriously, everything interesting today is categorized "Misc". The Miscellaneous Stuff is where it snows, it's where it happens. Because of this, the forum category itself has turned into a chaos of love and war." -Moonblaze
299. "Why do you say that Bush isn't intelligent enough to be president? I think if he can influance then he has more than enough to confensate for his bad english." -Michael
298. "you are all smogs" -SkulL
297. "If i wasn't a buddhist i'd kick you from the channel right now." -Slayo
296. "I am a griefer as a teenager but still a parent, I own!" -Tublear
295. "but the way you downsized my face with a metaphorical shovel just now..." -Conker (to Trafton)
294. "well i dont like it i am proub of my dick i wont do it just to have sex they need to loveme for who i am and not for what they ewant me to have or to be" -Shaney
293. "well i dont know why i allmost shave every hair of my body exept my dick hair and my head hair maybe i am afraid of cutting my balls of i dunno i simpely think thats just for girls shaving pubic hair" -Shaney
292. "Cry faces. All of you." -Moonblaze
291. "Lastly but certainly not leastly, WE HAVE GOTTEN 1000 VISITORS! PRAISE DE LERRD! Took long enough, aye? I will continue to say 'aye' like a Canadian!" -Spaztic
290. "who turned your brain off =\" -Shadow
289. "Anyway the skin of my nose fell off, years ago, and it took months before I got healed." -Tublear
288. "I don't like homosecaulity, but I don't care about it." -Tublear
287. "If the internet works, I can download that tommorow" -Tublear
286. "I don't give a crap about a dictionary, I'd wipe my backside with it's pages, but have fear of getting ink poisoning." -Michael
285. "Sarcasm makes you seem homosexual." -Michael
284. "u will get a good news at justice day if u follow the jesus" -hamsafar (#canada query)
283. "So in other words a corpse vagina fart might be worse than a normal ass fart" -Evilmike
282. "He'd sue your shit off." -Trafton
281. "It's not a shame, you don't want to be a playa or a pimp. Find the girl that you truly like, settle down, blah blah, etc, sex." -Tublear
280. "I hit alt f four on mIRC instead of the ass master." -Trafton
279. "if u cant read it then you need to read my book - how to read" -the lan meister
278. "The intentional ones just like seeing people get man." -iCeD (on trolls)
277. "I could easily give in, but why would I want to? I have God on my side, whether I believe in him or not." -Conker
276. "I'm not a fan of the French, but not because of their homosexual tendencies." -Conker
275. "Water is used everday for me, lol." -JJ Tublear
274. "and he looks at vaginas all day long Disturbing a thing my spine... i love them with needles." -Tickbot
273. "Hey, you stole mine voice! Thats illetion, kid! :-#" -Bjarni
272. "I don't drink bear, so i can't get drunk." -Bjarni
271. "EvilMike fucked an eGG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1111 pigeon" -Tickbot
269. "She want mall." -AutoVoice
268. "I ran to the basketball." -AutoVoice
267. "rocks!" -AutoVoice
266. "He want a horse." -AutoVoice
265. "they would really like to truck" -AutoVoice
264. "Jewboy fucked a STAR WARS RIPOFF!!!!!!!!!111 dog" -autovoice
263. "Ass monkey had fun buying a fuck." -autovoice
262. "Ass monkey craps vcr" -autovoice
261. "Jewboy extremely want Cock." -autovoice
260. "Ass monkey fucks Dick." -autovoice
259. "We piss on my ass million dollars" -autovoice
258. "i extremely want microphone" -autovoice
257. "Europeans have an obvious bias when it comes to American politics because they subscribe too much to French media." -Conker
256. "They are destroying the community just to destroy me." -Conker (on the subject of #jj2 ops)
255. "my penis is very beag and a put in your mauth popo popo popo popo" -nik (random query from #america)
254. "mustafa from karachi pakistan we are making bed linen and garment" -ghaffar (#canada query)
253. "I DIE HIM TO HEAD!!!" -Danyjel (in his JCF signature)
252. "Ahem, avoid coaxing other users into fighting you. You can however coax yourself into fighting you." -Tublear
251. "I want to smash Trafton" -Conker
250. "Why the hell does gender apply to nouns anyway? Can they have sex with each other?"" -EvilMike
249. "Cave? What's caving about justice?" -Conker
248. "I love my daughter in concept, but the fire of hell will consume her soul in the afterlife and she will deserve it for her transgressions against the Lord." -Alan Keyes (fake quote on SA to a kindergarten class about his gay daughter)
247. "Mind fleeing us in, Mike? What the heck is marijuana?" -Moonblaze
246. "The movie has been claimed to be "anti-semitic" because of its portrayal of the Jews as merciless Christ-killers. Personally, I don't see how that's anti-semitic. Unless of course "anti-semitic" means "anti-Jew", in which case maybe just a little." -Stephen Colbert (on The Passion of the Christ)
244. "Cat piss isn't that bad." -iCeD
243. "Grab your nipples and run!" -Gummi
242. "To be nice I will say that why do you except people to know them all or even one, you are bragging you knolege and it's not lightly thaught upon, those who brag." -Sporadic
241. "assuming someone (male) has a girlfriend and wears a thong, that is gay, but he is with a girl" -Sporadic
240. "im gonna cut of YOUR VIRGIN EARS, and make them bleed, and then step on them, and put them in blenders, then ill have fresh fuckin ear juice, ahhhhh" -darkenlord
239. "ill put your ASS in the filter" -darkenlord
238. "Upgrade? Hipgrave. Oh, Mac." -Tickbot kick reason
237. "if someone in my school would say he has a gf over the net i would fucking throw his two ton bag at him then kick him till he passes out on the floor it's so sad" -Sporadic
236. "if i call you a pussy (no offense hehe) i dont' mean you are two vertical lips with a hole between them, i mean that you act like a girl which is gay- not the guy loving guy gay, you know what i mean man" -Sporadic
235. "what is this a sheep channel?" -bouz (on #canada)
234. "Why do you insist on sexualizing vaginas?" -Ed Helms
233. "Wher can I dld som more member" -JJ2 server name
232. "I want to MOW the grass ;)" -Bobby aka Dizzy
231. "I love organized crime it's so ironic." -Bobby aka Dizzy
230. "I would do Speed." -FireClaw
229. "Go Go Gadget Nader." -Spaztic
228. "I like black people, too. :-(" -FireClaw
227. "Hello, do you half for HELLO ?" -French guy from #canada
226. "CANADA IS NIGGER LOVER!" -a Swedish person in #canada
225. "Hey, that guy flying there is BUSH!" -Ninjajazz
224. "Secret message? what it means? anyway, I am now NINJA!!! I will not tell anything to you, not ur bisness" -Ninjajazz
223. "At some point you could drive in Texas with your shotgun in one hand and your bottle of beer in the other. Then, legislation was passed. You could no longer hold the shotgun." -Derby
222. "I want a bonejob. I'm a sick puppy, okay? ;-P" -FireClaw
221. "What is the time in your area Michael?" -AutoVoice
220. "wb av of SCIENCE" -AutoVoice
219. "Download or not? I guess so. :-)" -iCeD
216. "Oh, by the way, I registered b00bshop.net" -Trafton
215. "Hi how are u? Can u tell me your name age sex and land PLEASE?" -Rimi
214. "Washing State sucks!!!" -Exyle
213. "I have chinese installed." -Blackraptor
212. "Have a good die!" -Engrish
211. "ur life will continue until the day u die." -Ryu A$
210. "MMM, I LIKE CHEEZE WIZ" -iCeD (in 2001)
209. "keep your purple pubic hair to yourself" -courtney
208. "Do you come from Japan, China, or something country from Africa? You looks brown!" -Bjarni
207. "Milk spelled backwards is kill." -EvilMike
206. "Tickbot readme - lol - cool - can he do anything else?" -Tman
205. "It's a wide known fact that Alice and Wonderland introduced kids to Cocaine, and other drugs." -Tublear
203. "Hello I made from CHINA! May be use your home!" -iCeD
202. "So he gives bitch to me in 12 years?" -Spaztic (replying to typo)
201. "Then your father gave birth to you when you were 30." -Trafton
200. "Out of my colon, rather." -Derby (about where his apostrophes come from)
199. "Your grammar is on FIRE!" -Spaztic
198. "Go shut down your mouth." -Riptearrabbit
197. "In my culture, I would be well within my rights to dismember you." -Teal'c
196. "YOUR. GRAMMAR. SUCK." -Cooba
195. "It's not power abuse. It's power usage." -EvilMike
194. "I bet a gram of uranium is pretty heavy" -Spaztic
193. "What the hell is a shikabite I aint downb with the iowa slang" -Strolla68
192. "Then get a new ISP or a browser that supports html" -Crono
191. "Let's go to the MARS!!!" -JSZ Spaz
190. "More men are female than male." -Trafton
189. "Something tells me I have herpes because I just saw two pink spots on my butt." -LRK's Sister
188. "I only play wc3" -unhit`jk2
187. "Hey, everyone, just looking for some cool furry art sites, I think I'm becoming addicted =P" -Spaztic (in 2002)
186. "I still plan on becoming a Nonalcoholic when I get older." -Tublear
185. "You clearly intended to have no idea of what you are talking about." -JJ Tublear
184. "What the heck? Are you seriously joking?" -JJ Tublear
183. "i SWITch from jj2 to tsf and back to jj2" -Tublear
182. "Promises are bugs in our buggy world." -danyjel
181. "What kind of world is this? IT'S KIND OF CRAP!" -Engrish
180. "Big pimpin. I love George Bush." -Tickbot
179. "Smoking is breaking health. And I saw your health not only once..." -Danyjel
178. "I am Mary I am sory :) i want to lick your dick please autorise me" -ICQ
177. "Weather.com is back as it should be - in Spanish." -Trafton
176. "hey, i am finnish, does anybody give me may to my words? DUTCH IS BEST!" -NinjaJazz
175. "And please don't banner me, this were really joke in Finland." -NinjaJazz
174. "Sorry, it were accident and JCF on my computer can't delete these threads..." -NinjaJazz
173. "I must be the only person who can see the path to the forest rather than removing the forest." -Xion
172. "I don't want to work more than I want to." -Xion
171. "SJ IS MY CARIUOM" -Spaztic (drunk)
170. "I WORK MFOR MICKY MOSUS" -Cobra (drunk)
169. "SOBER DURK IS GAY" -Spaztic (when drunk)
168. "MONOFARLING SI RIGNA\" -Spaztic (when drunk)
167. "all say hallo the the running kernal of the geme :)" -br>piet
166. "Sorry my bjarnism, but you look like black screen with some photo... (oh... who is that?)" -danyjel
165. "I die that scanner to head! In true, I am not scared of zombies, so it's okay... Mommy... Mommy!!!" -Danyjel
164. "He still doesn't cunt." -Trafton (he meant count)
163. "The Internet looks like the Death Star wearing a green Hawaiian shirt." -Spaztic
162. "So your something like a white nigger" -Umba (in response to Wisety being from Africa)
161. "Actually only 30 percent of those struck by dying die." -Trafton (talking about lightning)
160. "Tentacle porn is better than horse porn" -blackcat1134
159. "Please shut the door and ROCK ON!" -Engrish.com (Sign on airport bus in Japan)
158. "Damn invaders!" -Xion
157. "And Jesus rose again in front of the floppy masses and declared, "JESUS CHRIST!"" -Tickbot
156. "I'm the biggest idiot in the retard." -Spaztic
155. "I'm not a pawn. I am not a slave, nor a servant. I have a mind of my own, and I use it. I hate lima beans. Do you need more reasoning than that?" -Xion
154. "I used to do drugs. I still do, but I used to, too." -Mitch Hedberg
153. "It's sometimes difficult to think clearly when you're strapped to a printing press." -Batman
152. "My special move is "laugh a lot of sweat"" -Spaztic
151. "I wanna have nibbles like powdered toast man" -mirrow
150. "Is this good? No. It is smoke." -Cooba
149. "your mum is so fat you need a map to find places." -mirrow
148. "yo mommas so fat that she runs away whenever she comes in the room" -Mazinkaiser
147. "yo momma's so ugly that when she entered a beauty contest she came in first and last" -Mazinkaiser
146. "yo momma's so fat that she ate a elephant when she was eating" -Mazinkaiser
145. "yo momma's so fat that when she went to a bar they put her tab on the table" -Mazinkaiser
144. "your mommas so fat that she ate a zip code whole" -Mazinkaiser
143. "your momma's so fat she's the mayor" -Mazinkaiser
142. "IT IS DUDE!!! Why? Foce you is DUDE!!!" -Bjarni
141. "Im in very trouble" -Bjarni
140. "Excuse me I had bean mistake! Sorry!" -Bjarni
139. "i have no brain so i cant grow it." -Danyjel
138. "Hello GHOST OF A DARKNESS!!! Cool you are REALY COMES FROM DARKNESS!!! also cool!" -Bjarni
137. "I am so sick of black people calling me." -mcatis
135. "ROTFing on the floor." -Cooba
134. "Nagas are mostly black." -Cooba
133. "I know what a pain it is. It's hideous feeling." -Cooba
132. "Orange rhymes with strange." -Cooba
131. "It swim, swim, hungry round, I think." -Cooba
130. "penis reg ;)" -Tickbot
129. "I leik dem Ferret Boobies ;>>>" -Xion
128. "Vaginas are a catalyst for orgasms." -Spaztic
127. "Dude, jesus was great." -Wild Angel
126. "i aint stupid.. i was being phycastic" -No1Nemesis
125. "But this is better than men on steroids wearing underwear." -Labratkid
124. "so this is a leet chan right :>" -Nomaru
123. "I'll be.. erm.. 28. Err... 45... No... 4... Errmmm.. 12! Dat's it!" -iCeD
122. "I was probably the nazi of all n00bs" -VeggieMan
121. "i want to see you wear your boxers, not listen to them" -SlaYo
120. "First i wanted to get the eiffel tower tattood on my dick. But then I would be left with too much untattood space." -Slayo
119. "Feel the smell! >P" -Cooba
118. "My prostate is on fire, and this way is my testicles. For this reason its my testicles on fire." -Xion
117. "I use most of the time Colgate and Crest sometimes, rarely." -Tublear
116. "Does this rhino ever get lonely and want to interact with other rhinos? Has he ever asked you for a PlayRhino magazine? Like a Playboy magazine. Except for rhinos." -Labratkid
115. "J2O official statement: Blablablablablablablabla" -ShadowGpW
114. "Caps make you feel like a MAN!" -EvilMike
113. "i hate it when i miss the tissue ;|" -Labratkid
112. "Undefined, smartass." -Tickbot
111. "I`m no noob im playing half hour" -Skull
110. "Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Because he turned into a skeleton." -EvilMike's brother
109. "I hate unfair." -danyjel
108. "If you took a shit in the toilet of life, what would your turds be like?" -Spaztic
107. "Public Wanking is a federal offense. I learned that the hard way." -Ninja
106. "It's sort of hard. Want me to grab it?" -Krezack
104. "my nose is on fire because i was inhaling mass ammounts of pine sol haha whee" -Ninja
103. "Ri is 1.73 cm and Opie is 63 ft tall. Quite a range of heights around here ;P" -Monolith
102. "I have just experienced the second coming of Christ. A polite telemarketer just called." -Labratkid
100. "THO - Man did not invent Air Conditioning for himself." -Spaztic
99. "Nothing beats a warm cup of piss." -Optic^
98. "Sex has something to do with porn! :-#" -bjarni
97. "You know you've found a good porno when there's queefing." -iCeD
96. ".......and I'm the persetent of the United States" -Bjarni impersonating George Bush
95. "ur drunk" -JJ Tublear
94. "BANN ElectroPizza, she sucks!" -Bjarni
93. "Hey? U have a scar in ur trousers? A tiger do that perhaps?" -PartyBunny
92. "anyway thanks vor reviewing and a 1.0 or a 1.2 is very high for mij first full level poket" -Leole
91. "Let's get some C-4 explosives and blow the school doors sky high!" -theWINNER
90. "Thats not porn, Thats hentai!" -Bjarni
88. "Sometimes the flush of my toilet is musical." -Krezack
87. "Will J2Ov2 have any new features?" -Snooz
86. "I CAN JUMP LIKE BIG JESUS :D" -Disguise
85. "Although one time my bedroom light went heywire and was all, like "I'm going to electrocute you" so I was all, like "Dammit I'm glad this thing isn't in the toilet"." -Krezack
84. "I am still master of my domain." -George (on Seinfeld)
83. "I'm not O'Brien! JERRY!!! JERRY!!!" -George (on Seinfeld)
82. "That is one magic loogie." -Jerry Seinfeld
81. "I'm a boy. But if people see me on street, they always think I'm a girl! =D" -wadledee
80. "Hardcode programming makes geeks get stiffies." -Krez
79. "You think a lot. Hehe, when I go to sleep I usually dream about women or video games or nothing." -JJ Tublear
78. "Now I'm radioactive! That can't be good!" -DoomComic
75. "Roads aren't made out of bacon. They are made out of road." -EvilMike
74. "i inspire old women that hardly are horny" -Shadow
73. "I am farting like crazy tonight.. and my farts smell like toxic death!" -VeggieMan
72. "no. you quert my, baby ;D" -Ninjapixie
71. "ppl fall from top of building in ur country after seeing u after ur gf" -Kakashi
70. "u dont even know u dont need to grow drugs. u get them free from the air condition." -Kakashi
69. "Lemon juice and drink it while punking with sex in the yard my mother taught her that!" -VeggieMan
68. "my mother taught me that and i take care of the yard and puke while having sex." -Kakashi
67. "Wow, my meager brain could mind brain your candy ass." -JJTublear
66. "Like the waters that trickle past the wide open meadow and the birds who sing their songs of love, the Elvish live in harmony and eat bacon." -AtmcFeline
65. "With Natalie Portman around, not a single guy in the world would need Viagra." -SlaYo
64. "Don't you hate it when even you can't stand the smell of your own fart?" -iCeD
63. "Remember, tense and release. Good luck." -Krezack
62. "yeah i only like sex with a guy if the guy is actually a girl" -mcatis
61. "I have friends! >:(" -ElectroPiZZa
60. "Masturbation is cute. ;)" -Ri
59. "aka the CROTCH" -Strato
58. "Walking to the bar takes 10 minutes...walking back from the bar takes 2 hours." -SlaYo
57. "I have a lot of time on my hands and feet." -ElectroPiZZa
56. "I'm gonna rip your head off and shit down your neck!" -Duke Nukem
55. "I had a gardenburger and the garden with it!" -Ninjapixie
52. "This... is... my... BOOMSTICK!" -Ash
51. "If you can't beat them, arrange to have them beaten." -George Carlin
50. "Or you can duct tape the palms of your hands. That way you can't feel shit when you wank!" -Xion
49. "Well yeah, but MOM stands for Multiple Orgasms Maiden." -Spaztic
48. "Just about any other warm beverage beats a nice warm cup of piss." -BlurredD
46. "Uh-huh, talk to the ear cause the hand dont have none poopiehead" -SlaYo
45. "That's fun over safety." -Shadow
44. "I am deeply rage right now." -Shadow
43. "Sex is painful for me, sadly" -Strato
42. "..." -Xion
41. "Saddam Hussein is in Jale!!" -XAYo HR
40. "You mean wank?" -Everyone
39. "My name is Buck... and I'm here to fuck." -Buck
38. "My internet is on fire!!!" -RSG
37. "This is such an animusic ripoff!!" -Xion
36. "Ouch... penis fracture." -Strato
35. "I'm a godo christian but I draw slutmouse" -Strato (about Noogy)
34. "I am liquid sex." -Sobe
33. "I am Hans... and I am Franz... and ve are going to PAHMP! YOU AHP!" -Hans and Franz
32. "Do not taunt the happy fun ball." -Saturday Night Live
31. "But it was so hot inside... so I killed a tent full of old guys." -mst3k
30. "Hello there guys. Make some toast or something." -mst3k
29. "Ladies and gentlemen... Mike Nelson is... LORD OF THE DANCE!! DadadaduhduhduhDadadaduhduhduh" -mst3k
27. "YOU'RE THE MAN NOW DOG!" -Sean Connery
26. "I'm ABOUT TO BREAK!" -Chester
25. "Here's the part where cameron goes berserk." -Ferris Beuller
24. "I like doing british ssoccer commentators and then my lungs collapse and when I come to I am in jail." -EvilMike
23. "I enjoy... I enjoy... I enjoy..." -danyjel
22. "HEWWO!!! 8D 8D 8D" -Disguise
21. "Winners don't lose frogs." -Jill of the Jungle
20. "There is no damned add button" -Xion
19. "TRIVIA ON!!" -JJTublear
18. "A last negative thing is the sucker tubes, they suck." -Moonblaze
17. "Hello, guys. Lets play FOOTBALL!!!!!" -Bjarni
16. "Why must you focus on the negitive things?" -Xion
15. "Thats a zero think!" -Bjarni
14. "most practise fields don't bleed" -mcatis
13. "I just did the dumbest thing ever. Good thing I'm wearing pants." -Spaztic
12. "Word up I guess ;)" -VeggieMan
11. "Home 10 - Visitors NO!" -Some parenting book from the 80s
10. "Iron the yeti you stupid mom." -EvilMike
9. "reg ;)" -AutoVoice
8. "Pluck out your eyes and saw off your limbs." -Jesus Christ
7. "So, the moral of the story is... electocute your penis, I guess." -Spaztic
6. "ur ass is, liek, candy" -JJ Tublear
5. "The internet makes you stupid." -SomethingAwful
4. "I'm a dinosaurus! Roar, roar! Hey, everybody! I'm a dinosaur!" -Pete