Originally Posted by Cooba

Aaaaand do you think that where are we at the moment?

*Aaaaand where do you think we are at the moment?


See if there are any people around, and if there are, ask one of them ( preferrably one who doesn't look like they were going to kill us or something ) whether there is anything really important or so in this town. ..as politely as that can possibly be asked, I guess.

Pageclaim, too. >o

Go north.

“Follow me… TO ADVENTURE!” I commanded my party, and began walking along North Street. L33tz4n slithered back slightly and looked over the edge of the pier.
“The water looks lower than the last time we were here…” she observed before running after us.
Eventually the street took a left. At the corner there were the doors to a large bakery and the entrance to a hotel next to it. A man was standing here with what appeared to be a giant alien demon vampire eating his brain. Shuriken put her hand on her blade defensively.
“Is there anything of importance in this town?” I asked the man.
He shrugged. “Eh. It’s a pretty big place. There’s Scholar Sam’s Magic Academy to the east somewhere, if I remember right.”
“You have a giant alien demon vampire eating your brain,” I pointed out to him.
“Yeah, that kind of sucks.”
“You want us to get it off?”
“Nah. Furious the Monkeyboy will come by and save me eventually. What I could really use is a soda right now.”
“Okay, thanks. Hello,” I greeted the man and proceeded to check my surroundings for new fun directions to go. The street went south back to the dock, farther east, and there were entrances to the two buildings.

Inventory

Thank the man and say farewell, look at the photograph, then go east and search for Scholar Sam's Magic Academy; we could always use some new spells.

We could of course ask him where it is.

I bowed deeply. “Fare thee well, good face! And thankee!” I said as Britishly as possible. The man with the alien demon vampire latched onto his head smiled and waved goodbye.
I led the party along the road to the east. It ultimately split in two directions; one going north and one going south. The north path was labeled “Teleporter to Scholar Sam’s Magic Academy - this way”. The south path led to the gate of a park or something.
“The Magic Academy,” Araches pointed out, as if she had no faith in my amazing observational abilities, “we could get Sam to teach us some new spells.” L33tz4n and Fawriel nodded in agreement.
I took the photograph out of my pocket and looked at it. I could tell it was very old because it was brownish colored and the art style was crap. It depicted the old party of local heroes; Sam before he became an old guy, Trafton before he became a French hippy, Sear when he had hair, Pandora before she died, Grandma Conquista the Ultimate Evil when she was younger, and Fooruman looking exactly the same as usual. Evidently, Fooruman had long ago reached that age where you stop getting visibly older. In the time since the photo was taken, Sam had became a magic teacher, Conquista had opened a grocery store in Placespot, and Trafton had started a cult or something.

North. Enter Teleporter. =D

Taking off along the north road, we soon reached the sparkly blue teleporter. This teleporter was created to take people from New Super Ultra Uber Megatropolis to Scholar Sam’s Magic Academy, which was located in Lower Placespot. Lower Placespot was a happy place because it was underwater. There were lots of fish. Fish can fly underwater. It’s really cool.
A brief lighting effect later, we found ourselves in the small bookshelf lined room of Scholar Sam’s Magic Academy. It was pretty small for an academy. An airlock had been added since our last visit; likely in case any fish cared to learn magic. I looked out of a window. Something white was blocking it and I couldn’t see the water outside.
L33tz4n glanced around. “Sam?” she called out. There was no response.
“He’s prolly not home,” Araches concluded, taking a book off a shelf and flipping through the pages. “And these are just spell descriptions. If we want to learn anything, we’d have to wait until he’s back.”
Obvious exits were the airlock and the teleporter back to the city.

Knock on the window to see if the white thing responds. Examine self.

I tapped on the glass of the window. The whiteness covering it did not respond. “Hello,” I offered. There was still no response. I frowned at the window. It didn’t frown back. I concluded that it was either dead or mean and ignoring me.
“I’m going to examine myself now,” I explained aloud. I looked down at my body. “I’m gray and fuzzy. Except for the parts of me that are made of metal. They’re smooth and feel like car parts. And I wear this sleeveless thing that emphasizes my manly physique. Sexy,” I noticed I was now striking a dramatic pose and flexing my biceps. Shuriken, despite not being much of a magic user, joined Araches to look through the spellbook. Fawriel glanced around uncomfortably and L33tz4n slithered back a bit, looking embarrassed. “Oh, and I have pants,” I added. I had forgotten to mention I had pants. That must have been why they were looking at me weird.

Ask L33tz4n to go through the airlock and examine the surroundings. Assume everything that slithers can breath underwater. Or just go back through the teleporter and ask around for anyone who knows where Sam might be.

I turned to L33tz4n, who had backed a ways into the shadows. “L33tz4n, I need you to go out the airlock and see what’s there.”
“But… it’s underwa-”
“You can breathe underwater because you slither around like a snake or iguana or something else that can breathe underwater.” She cast me an offended glare and slithered off to look at the book with Araches and Shuriken. Fawriel looked at me, then the girls, then walked over to join them.

Tell them that they can wait here, you are going back through the teleporter to look for Sam.

Originally Posted by Radium

Obvious exits were the airlock and the teleporter back to the city.

Look for unobvious exits.

I glanced around for unobvious exits. The ground and walls appeared to be mostly solid, as did the ground. The ground being twice as solid as the walls, that is. Sometimes, though, hidden exits behind a bookshelf are opened by pulling on the right book. “I’m going to go back and look for Sam,” I told the rest of my party, “if you touch some book and the wall opens, come get me.”
“If the wall opens we’ll all drown,” L33tz4n pointed out.
“Get me first.”
I stepped back into the teleporter, watched the sparkly light effect, and found myself in the city of New Super Ultra Uber Megatropolis. I strolled back down the road to where the street went east back to the bakery, hotel, and pier, and south to a park of some kind.

Go into the hotel and look for a visitor center to get a map of the area.

Originally Posted by Radium

“The water looks lower than the last time we were here…” she observed before running after us.

Realized that this is impossible and glitch it.

It was a typo D=. And what are you going to do, turn time back and slither that ten feet?

I followed the road to the east until I came to the hotel entrance. The bell on the door made a cheerful noise as I stepped inside. “Hello,” I said to the bell. It didn’t respond, so I backed away slowly and then ran the rest of the way in.
It was a pretty small hotel; it consisted solely of a lobby and a hallway to the rooms. “Excuse me, sir; do you possess maps of this area?” I asked the tall, kind looking woman at the counter.
She raised an eyebrow. “A map? Why do you need a map?”
“I’m looking for Scholar Sam.”
“Did you check his magic academy?” she asked, obviously having no faith in my amazing observational skills.
“Yes, sir, we did.”
“And he wasn’t there?”
“Yes, sir, he wasn’t.” After I said this I began to wonder if the proper way to word it was “No, sir, he wasn’t”. It was, however agreeing with what she said. But then again, I was saying someone was not there. I thought about it for about five minutes. The woman politely waited until I stopped staring into space to finish.
“I’m going to go steal books,” she concluded, and walked out the door. The bell made a cheerful noise as she exited. It must have liked her more than it liked me.

Go west.
Enter teleporter.
Regroup with party.
Exit academy.
Magic Map to Pandora's Island.

Use all ten fingers to touch the map.

I walked out through the door (which made the happy ringing noise again when I exited) and went east back to the teleporter, rejoining my party.
For the sake of experiment, I tried touching all the locations on the map at once. Nothing happened. Disappointed, I proposed we travel to Pandora’s Island and quickly tapped the picture of the island before any of them could disagree.
After the mandatory flash of light, I found myself standing on the shore of Pandora’s Island. The paths had grown over a tad since our last visit, but there were two clear trails through the bizarre, green-stemmed trees that went to the east and west. I looked around. Shuri was the only other person here.
“You’re not everybody else,” I commented.
“No. No I’m not,” she responded. There was a long, awkward silence before she continued. “They never regrouped with you. They were happier looking through a book that was none of them could actually use.”
“Huh. That’s weird.” There was another long silence. “We can go get them later or something. Let’s go to ADVENTURE!”

Inventory

Sprint down the east trail.

“Let’s go to east,” I said, sprinting merrily down the east trail. Soon, the path ended at what appeared to be the ruins of a castle. Most of it had collapsed in on itself, and some of it had collapsed on the mutilated body of a dead person. I silently wondered if the person was dead and mutilated to begin with, or if it was a side effect of having a castle collapse on you. Bits of the castle still stood, but most of it was now a pile of broken stones and splintered wood. I’m not sure where the wood came from.
“I remember this place,” I told Shuriken, “I built it.”
She looked at me with disbelief. “You built it?”
“Yeah. With a brick wall and a cardboard box. Oh, and the invisible gremlins helped a little.”
“O… kay.”

Give Shuriken a broken stone, and examine the body.

Check your arm for laser things.

I carefully searched the rubble until I located a nice, rock-shaped stone. I heaved it off the ground and presented it to Shuriken. “Here, take this stone.”
She looked at me confused. “Why?”
I didn’t understand what was so confusing to other people about picking up everything that wasn’t nailed down. “You know,” I answered with rising frustration, “in case we need it later. What’s so hard to understand?” She reluctantly accepted the boulder and cast me a soul piercing glare, to which I waved back and said hello. I then proceeded to check my awesome robotic arm for laser guns. To my disappointment, I found none.
I examined the dead man. His head was flat, as though a castle had fallen on it, and there were the ruins of a castle on top of his head. He was wearing a white jacket with red sleeves and a red leaf printed on the back. His denim jeans had a chain running from his belt and hooked to his pocket. His feet sported a fine pair of ruby slippers.

Inventory

Take the slippers.

The man didn’t appear to be particularly alive, and dead people usually don’t need to wear shoes - unless they’re the dancing kind of dead people. Considering this man couldn’t very well dance with a castle on his head, I removed his shoes. For a moment I wondered why he was wearing them in the first place, but concluded he probably stole them off another dead person.
The only obvious exit was the path leading back west to the shore.

Inventory

Duct tape his feet to the gound. We wouldn't want the wind to blow away the poor dead man's feet, do we? Return west and go west.

EDIT:

Originally Posted by Radium

The only obvious exit was the path leading back east to the shore.

Wouldn't the path lead back west back to the shore? We came east to get here.

We have DUCT TAPE?
The game is as good as won!

...I don't really have any commands to give. I'm not good at randomly walking around. At least in games.

I whipped out my trusty roll of duct tape and began binding the dead man’s feet to the ground. Shuri watched me inquisitively. “What are you doing?” she asked.
“Taping this man’s feet to the ground. So they don’t blow away,” I explained, as though it weren’t obvious. “I took his hot shoes.” Shuri refrained from asking any further questions as I finished ensuring the man’s feet were safe in this cruel, hard world.
Upon completion, the two of us traveled west back to the shore and continued down the path for some time until we reached a small log-cabin-style building. A sign hanging above the door read “Pandora’s Island Trading Post”. We had visited the trading post before in our travels. Though it appeared abandoned, it was constantly observed by tiny invisible gremlins that were ready to flay the skin from your body if you tried to walk off with something without leaving something else. Occasionally Bill Gates would come and buy everything in order to destabilize the economy. I entered the building and examined the items I was carrying and the items that lay on the ground.

For Trade

Inventory

Trade slippers for empty bottle. (Haven't you ever played Zelda? >O )

Attempt to trade the photograph for the Nail, Toy Canadian, Soda, and Bishop. Surely such rare art should be worth a lot.

As a side note:
Because of radium's absence, I have lost my grip over what has happened so far.

Trade the pogo stick instead of the slippers.

We might NEED the pogo stick to use as a weapon, or at least to jump high.

Start breakdancing after the trades are complete, out of pure joy.

Originally Posted by ZAPPER

As a side note:
Because of radium's absence, I have lost my grip over what has happened so far.

Shuriken went and found Araches. Then the POV changed to Uberbob. Uberbob is walking around and using the Magic Map to teleport to different places now. And no, Ae, you can't get a super good deal for the photograph.



I picked up the metal nail and empty bottle and in trade put down the slippers and old photograph. Out of the sheer joy of trading, I broke into dance. Shuriken watched, terrified.

For Trade

Inventory

Trade the pearldiver's knife and the pogo stick for the Cola and the Toy Canadian. Touch the New Super Uber Ultra Megatropolis on the Magic Map. Walk to where the man with the giant alien demon vampire eating his brain is, and give him the Cola.

that might be a waste of cola...;|. or waste of a trade.