Note: I'll try to get everyone into the story with good parts, but I can't really think of anything for phoenix wing, and Fawriel seems to be the best choice for many situations.

BTW Piccolo, do you think I should start a poll about this story? Like rate it from 1 to 10?

Dunno about the poll.
But you HAVE to get Pho a good part!
She's clever and pretty strong for a girl(after all,she's a cat!).

Uh,I think EVERY thread gets rateable after a while...
at least my Have you seen this person thread did...
But the poll would be a good idea,ah think!^.^

It has? I didn't see anywhere where I could rate it.

At the very bottom...
This thread doesn't have it...

About the name...
what about:"the a-team"?
o.O;;

Okay,just kidding,this is a really-hard-to-find-a-name-for-story!

I think you can only rate the ones in the comedy cafe... And you can rate all the ones in the comedy cafe...

How about: Why does everything happen to ME?

Sounds quite good!^.^
A little self-centered,though.
Kinda more...uhm:
I HATE mondays?
Okay,since it has nothing to do wif mondays,yours is better!

Whee!^.^We have a name!^.^

Darn! I can't change the name of the thread. Does anyone know how?

Ehm,if you edit the first post,you can also change the name!

I edited the first post, and it DIDN'T change the name!

Can't be!
It worked with my Happy Birthday,Soulfire-thread!

Piccolo,correction edit:Nope,it didn't!^.^;;
It just changed the heading of the first post,not the thread!

Originally posted by acid
Heh... Either that or Scarry Sarry...

Unless someone else wants to play that part...

Uh, I bet I'm too late. xD

Well, Sarry is not really evil. She just looks like she's evil. She's a caring person, but she doesn't talk much, so noone really knows on which side she is.
She actually helps the good guys, but sometimes she falls in love with one of the bad guys

Well, if you still have some part for her, feel free to include her. I'd love to be in your story

Originally posted by $kúlg
I'd love to be in your story

*Is jealus*
ICQ you traitor! ;-P (j/k, but still ICQ :P)

Que Passa!!!!

Falling in love with badguys, huh... I've known people like that...
Sounds to me as if Scarry Sarry would be a better villians side-kick then a master villian, if she's gonna be bad in this story...

Anyway, who am I to play casting dirrecter./\/\

I claim Page five!

...so, If nobody wants it, then it must be very radioactive, or poisness, or somthing...

And sombody must own it if nobody dosen't....

You have 3 months, 1 week, 4 days, 9hours, 37 minutes, and 41 seconds b4 nobody will rule carrotus

Originally posted by acid
They had been walking a while, when suddenly Jack stopped, and fired. About 20 yards ahead, a smoldering security camera lay on the floor.
“Nice,” said Acid. “With you around, we don’t have to worry about the security cameras!”

Did I mention "go me"?

Anyway, like I said before, very schwa story. Interesting character development on acid's part, also. (heehee, exploding coffee maker...)

BTW, idea for the name: The Doomsday Device, or Machine, or something. Titles that are really ominous usually denote a good story. I mean, Stephen King and all them horror writers always use ominous titles, don't they? Well, either ominous or straight-to-the-point, like Christine, or something. But "The Bubble" kinda lacks that... whatever it is that... does... stuff... in a title.

BLAAAAAA.

“Okay, so everyone’s clear on the plan?” Asked Jack Flash.
“Yeah!” responded the other three.
They set off towards the reactor room, or at least where they thought it would be. They were just guessing.
“Okay, remind me again, who has the TNT?”
“I do,” said Electrik.
“Good.”
They were planning to set a load of TNT for 2 minutes, place it next to the reactor core, and RUN. After a little bit of searching, they found the reactor room, labeled by its Authorized personnel only and DANGER: radiation signs.
“Okay, had me the TNT.”
Electrik was about to hand it over, when suddenly something hit it and knocked it out of his hand, and off the catwalk. He looked up.
“Not so fast,” said Terminator. By his side was Omicron and Black Jack, Jack Flash’s evil clone. And being Jack’s clone, he shared the perfect marksmenship.
“Don’t anybody make a move, or else someone’s gonna get hurt!” Yelled Black Jack, pointing his gun at the group.
“We certainly didn’t expect this, did we?” said Electrik.
“Now would you all exit this room, and we can have a little talk,” said Terminator.
Phoenix wing Leapt from the catwalk, onto a large tube hanging from the ceiling.
Black Jack fired. Something fell from the ceiling down into the white glow from the reactor core.
“As I said, nobody move! Unless you want to end up like your friend there.” Said Black Jack.
Suddenly, something started clanking. It sounded like someone pounding on a pipe.
“Eh? What’s up with the reactor?” Terminator said as he looked at the source of the clanking. It was one of the large pipes above them. Suddenly it fell, making a big hole in the catwalk that Terminator, Omicron and Black Jack were standing on. They were so surprised by the sudden drop of the pipe, they didn’t notice a figure darting onto another pipe.
“Omicron, see if you can see what’s wrong,” said Terminator.
“SCANNING.”
A few moments passed, then Omicron said “LIFE FORM DETECTED.”
Everyone looked up. They saw a dark figure running along a pipe towards the central pylon. Black jack fired again. The pipe the figure was running on fell, but the figure gabbed onto another pipe. It hung for a second, then swung itself onto a ledge on the central pylon.
“Get it! That’s where the plasma generator is!”
Black Jack fired again.
“You idiot! You’ve shot the generator!
The figure leapt onto the platform, pinning Black Jack.
“Whaaa??? I thought I shot you!” Said Black Jack.
“Funny how your eyes deceive you, isn’t it?” Said Phoenix Wing.
“WARNING, SELF DESTRUCT SEQUENCE ACTIVATED. SELF DESTRUCT IN TWO MINUTES.” Said the ship’s computer.
Terminator and Omicron ran out of the room, and Black Jack flung off Phoenix Wing and did the same. Phoenix Wing followed them. The rest of the group ran out the other exit.
When the rest of the group caught up with Phoenix Wing, she had lost them. They ran back to their ship, and took off. At least they had destroyed his station.

A minute later, they watched the station blow itself apart. It was a very interesting scene to watch.
“Now we can head back to Carrotus, and- what’s that?
Everyone looked at the dot on the radar that was behind their ship.
“Strange,” said Electrik.
*BOOM!!!*
The ship rocked with the force of the explosion.
“What the heck was THAT?!?” Shouted Jack.
They looked out the rear. Terminator was in a ship behind them and chasing them to Carrotus!
“We can’t fight them out here, we need to get to Carrotus!” Yelled Electrik as another blast rocked the ship. “Full throttle!”
Even at full throttle, Terminator’s ship easily stayed right behind them. Electrik watched in horror as the shields rapidly dropped from all the laser fire. First 50%, then 40%, 32%, 24%, 18%, 17%, and 10%. Electrik looked up. Carrotus was in view!
“WARNING!!! WARNING!!! SHIELDS DEPLETED!” Blared the ship’s computer.
They were in Carrotus’s atmosphere now, and the titanium allow was doing its best to withhold both the friction from the atmosphere and the constant laser blasts. Finally, the atmosphere was behind them. But they still had to deal with Terminator.

There! That's the longest chapter I've written so far. I've included Phoenix wing, too!

This story is L337!!!

Even the parts that have sombody in them...

Keep it yup!

`N0

w00t w00t! no argument heyah!

did i just say that?

Great story so far.

Noooooo!!!

Don't let it die!!!

I must have more!!!
Acid, can i help wright it?
Id like to do the part where they hafta find me it...

`N0

Little late, but can I join too? I'll be a guard on Carrotus and I'll have to protect the queen or someone from Mr. Evild00d and then I follow the second evild00d to destroy him, after someone or other kills evild00d #1 just as I arrive. Or any other way you could incorporate me into your story. Please:

Name:Flint
Occupation:Elite Queens Guard
Weapons:A Full rapid fire blaster and powered flamer.
History:Slightly larger, and stronger then normal rabbits, since he is a hare. He was born on nippius, b4 Devan invaded. As a baby him and his flamily escaped Devan's main assault, fleeing to carrotus. Later, he would lead the second assault, and recapture Nippius, defeating Devan's troops at the Durok Fortress, which Jazz had missed. He succesfully liberated the planet and rescued the captive hares that were being held prisoner. But he decided to go back to Carotus because he had no memory of Nipius as he was too young when he his parents fled. And he regards Carotus as his home.
Characteristics:has an accent,(due to being born on Nipius)and is very friendly and honest. He is a tactics expert and a born leader.
Special: Being a guard member he can call for cool stuff like super powerful tanks that belong to the Queen. Also being trained as an elite guard he is really good at protecting people.
Appearance: Tall and stocky with grey fur and a white stomach. His gun is blue. Also he wears body armor and has a tattoo showing that he is a member of the elite guard.

Hopefully its not too late and you can still incorporate him into your story.

“Electrik, see if you can get the computer to show a diagram of the ship’s armor,” said Jack.
“Sure thing!” said Electrik. He fiddled with a few of the switches, and then the computer showed a model of their ship. It then got shaded over with green, and then got shaded in how damaged it was. The more damaged it was, the redder it was. Electrik looked worriedly over at the engine area, where the diagram showed a very definite shade of orange. “Oh no! They’re trying to blast into our engine!”
The orange faded to red, and then snapped to black.
“WARNING!!! ARMOR COVER BREACH-“ the computer didn’t have time to finish what it was saying.
*BOOM!!!*

Somewhere in Carrotus palace…

A purple rabbit entered the room. He was wearing small glasses and a green backpack.
“Yes, Wizard Of Odds?” said Jazz.
“We lost track of them on the radar. Their ship might have been destroyed, but they might have survived.”
“We should send a search party out right away to find them!”

A little while later, Captain J. Firefox, Blaze Blackrabbit, Headcheese and Wizard of Odds set off to try to find where the ship had disappeared.
“It should be over in this direction,” said Wizard of Odds.
After a little while of searching, they saw a crashed ship. Headcheese ran up to it. She opened a hatch, poked her head in and said, “Hewwo!!!”
“Headcheese! Where did you come from?!?” said Jack.
The rest of the search party ran up to the ship.
Wizard of Odds radioed Jazz at the palace.
“We found them!”
“Good!” came the voice at the other end.
“Okay, let’s get back. They’ll be waiting for us!” said Wizard Of Odds.
“Leaving so soon, are you?”
Everyone looked up. Terminator was in his ship, and didn’t look very merciful.
“Out of ideas, eh? Well too bad,” said Terminator. He trained all of his guns on the group.
“RUN!!!” yelled Electrik.
Everyone ran just as a barrage of bullets would have pulverized them if they hadn’t. Terminator swerved his ship and began chasing them.
“Okay, I’ve got a plan!” said Acid. “We’ll split into two groups. Jack, Electrik, Fawriel and Phoenix Wing can run back and try to attack Terminator, while the rest of us try to distract him!”
Everyone decided this was a good plan. When the ship got really close, they jumped as high as they could.
Terminator heard several bumps, but he dismissed them with a shrug. Omicron didn’t. He walked over to the lift and told it to take him to the roof.
When he got there, he saw the attackers on the roof of the ship. They did not seem to notice them yet. He identified them by how much of a threat they were, and how dangerous it would be to attack them. He decided that he would attack Phoenix Wing.
200 pounds of black metal pounded into Phoenix Wing’s back, nearly knocking her of the ship. She whirled around, and saw Omicron readying for another attack. This time, she was prepared. Omicron launched forward, and Phoenix Wing did the same, and the two met in the center and began fighting. Everyone else knew that if they tried to help Phoenix Wing, it has a 50% chance of hurting her instead.
Omicron had been built to have more power than anything. One of his punches felt like 50 people punching you at the same time in the same spot. He had only been losing because he had been surprised by Phoenix Wing’s attack. Soon, however, he regained the edge in the fight. He waited for the perfect moment, and then landed one of his punches in Phoenix wing’s stomach. She flew straight into the tailfin and left a very large dent. Electrik, Fawriel and Jack Flash immediately started attacking Omicron because he was alone. Omicron knew only Electrik could do anything to him, and immediately laid him flat with a hefty blow to the head. He then turned to Fawriel. Fawriel kept his distance because he knew Omicron’s physical strength was much greater than his.
Jack meanwhile, was digging in his ammo pack for some TNT. He didn’t find any but found some electro blaster, which would work anyway. He shot at Omicron. The electricity fried Omicron’s circuits, and he shut himself down to prevent self-destruct. Fawriel ran over to Jack. He was kneeling by Electrik.
“He’s still breathing. It’s amazing he could survive a blow to the skull like that.” Said Jack Flash.
They ran over to Phoenix Wing.
“Okay, we need to get her out of here as soon as possible. It looks like she has a broken back, and that was no soft punch to her stomach area.” Said Jack. They both jumped off the ship with Phoenix Wing and Electrik, knowing that they couldn’t attack Terminator just yet. They ran off towards Carrotus City.

The distractions were huddled under a rock that would keep them from being seen by terminator. One of the shots from the ship had hit Firefox. Emmi was doing her best to heal it. Terminator was circling overhead, wondering where they went and what happened to Omicron.

There's chapter 5! I'm sorry there wasn't any part for you, Flint, but I will try to include you in a later chapter.

Anyone (or nobody) can help me with ideas on how to write my chapters, the plot, or they can WRITE actual chapters(e-mail them to me, though, don't just post them on here. I want to make sure I like them first before they get posted.

No quotation this time!

Erm,story is still cool,having stronger enemys makes it a little more interesting of course!^.^
Erm,I have some group of demons in my head,you could use those as soon as I drew and uploaded them!^.^
And I'm good at storys in general.Whee!
Me likes helping!^.^

BEEP! BEEP! BEEP! BEEP! The light on Acid’s transmitter lit up. He picked it up. “Yes?”
“I’m sorry, but we couldn’t make it. Omicron met us up there, and injured two of us. We couldn’t just leave them there, so we need a few of you to continue the attack.” Came Jack’s voice at the other end.
“…Okay…” said Acid. He switched off the transmitter. “Okay guys, we need some of us to get up there and continue the attack. Jack Flash said two of them had gotten injured, so they couldn’t continue the attack. Who should go this time?”
None of them moved.
“Okay, then I guess I’ll pick some myself. I’ll go, since my shoulder’s healed, and I’ll take Wizard, Blaze, and… Hmmm…” Acid considered. Headcheese was the only one left, besides FireFox, who had gotten hit, and Emmi, who was trying to heal him. “Headcheese can be a small diversion. She can run out, run around, and then get back under the rock before Terminator hits her.”
Headcheese nodded very enthusiastically, then shot out from under the rock.
“Here’s our chance!”
The three of them who were attacking ran out, and jumped onto the ship. They ran over to the lift shaft (Acid pausing to kick Omicron off the side of the ship) and got in. When they reached the cockpit, they hesitated.
“They probably know we’re here.”
“Yes, I do!” came a voice from the other side of the door.
The door opened. Terminator was there, flanked by Black Jack and a few guards.
Acid, Blaze and Wizard of Odds jumped out and began shooting. They took out a few guards, but they were cornered.
“Nowhere to run, nowhere to hide…” chuckled Terminator. “Now I can finally get rid of you and complete… Darn, Black Jack, what did I call it again?”
“The flux field.”
“Ah, yes, thank you.”
Acid took the opportunity to shoot the dash. The ship flew out of control, and began diving towards the surface.
Terminator, Blaze, Wizard of Odds, Black Jack, and Acid squeezed into the lift shaft, forgetting all about how they were supposed to kill each other for the moment. When they reached the top, they ran out, and jumped off the ship. When they had gotten off the ship, they suddenly realized they had had the perfect opportunity to get rid of each other in the lift, but had forgotten because they were so frantic to get out, and fell over anime style.
“Argh, I’ll get you for this!” yelled Terminator, launching himself at the group. Acid met him head on, and they both launched into a fight. Blaze and Wizard of Odds backed off- they knew when to give other people space. Suddenly the two fighters broke apart.
“You remember thirty years ago… before Jazz defeated Devan... You were a fighter then, not a petty inventor. Let’s see if you’ve still got the skill.” Terminator said. He pressed a button on something, and suddenly he and Acid disappeared.

They reappeared in a large room that was filled with lava. They seemed to be in a temple. There were platforms coming out of the lava. There were also platforms floating in midair that had a few cracks in them.
“You remember this? Asked Terminator. “You created it! And now, as the creator, let’s see if you know how to fight in it!”

There! That's probably by far the shortest chapter I've written besides the intor. How do you like it?

Nice.

Must i say more?

Just hurry up and finish off Terminator so i can take over carrotus.
`N0

Then do I get to finish you off too?

Then again, that might be an insult to Jack... i mean, killing nobody, he'd take that pretty hard...

Originally posted by acid
When they had gotten off the ship, they suddenly realized they had had the perfect opportunity to get rid of each other in the lift, but had forgotten because they were so frantic to get out, and fell over anime style.

I POSTED that?!?! O.o

Hehe... Oops.

i think your alternate self posted that, acid. no need to worry, you're not going insane.

I just thought of another paradox...

Nobody wants a human. Therefore, nobody has to get a human!

Ahhh... I love paradoxs.

Que Passa!!!!

Hyooomuuun.... TAAASTEEE!

Just kidding- I couldn't resist... (Removes Zombie costume.)

Me likes!
I just kinda got lost in the plot!^.^;;;
(Where the heck AM I?)
Erm,oh,yeah,Electrik's ready! Go look at him in"Piccolo Productions"!^.^

*claims the page fer Acid*

Rock on ^_^

`Duckah the ..late

I CLAIM THE THIRD PAGE!

btw... Paradoxes are good. Plotholes are bad.

Psh, 4I falcon, Piccolo already claimed the page.

Oi, sorry. Missed that.

*de-claims the page*

Great Story!Please try to include me, that would be so cool.

Ummm... Plotholes? Do I have one? Just tell me, and I'll get rid of it!!!

Nope, no plotholes as of yet. Plotholes are just bad in general.

“Bring it on!” shouted Acid right back at him.
The two began their fight.
Acid leapt onto the platform Terminator was on, and quickly ducked to avoid a kick from him. He spun around on the ground, knocking into Terminator and making him lose his balance. He jumped onto another platform. Acid jumped onto one of the floating platforms. The platform started to crumble! Acid leapt off just in time and knocked over Terminator. Acid had him pinned. Terminator was not bout to give up, though, and landed a kick that sent Acid flying. Terminator got up, and jumped over to where Acid was. Acid dodged Terminator’s kick then jumped on him. The two wrestled and rolled on the platform a little, and then Acid jumped back. Terminator followed him, and was rewarded for his efforts by a HARD kick in the stomach. Acid ran over to Terminator, and Terminator jumped up, swinging his blaster towards Acid. Acid wasn’t ready for it, and a loud CRACK sounded as Acid fell backwards, off the platform.
Terminator laughed. Evilly, not the hearty laugh of someone who has just seen something funny. “He never learns, does he? Nobody can beat me.”
A strange sound from below interrupted him. Terminator peered down, and saw Acid climbing back up!
Acid jumped onto the platform.
“Heh, amazing what a few trips to the rocknasium can do for your climbing skills.”
“Then why don’t we put your ‘skills’ to the test?!?” Said Terminator, a little annoyed at how this weakling could have survived.
Acid Ducked under Terminator’s punch, and jumped to avoid his kick. Acid then jumped back, onto another platform. He picked off one of the little cubes in the pillar. He tossed it up and down a few times, then threw it as hard as he could at Terminator. Terminator lost his balance a little, then leapt over towards Acid. Acid met him with another kick, and as Terminator flew backwards, Acid took out his bazooka and fired. When the smoke cleared, the platform Terminator had hit was gone, and so was Terminator. Acid wiped the sweat from his forehead.
“Hey, looking for someone?” came a voice from behind Acid. Terminator was there, and his gun was loaded. Acid dodged a barrage of bullets, and then jumped towards Terminator. Terminator let out another barrage of bullets that were easily dodged by Acid. Acid then leapt onto the platform where Terminator was and pinned him. Terminator tried to kick Acid, but Acid jumped back. Acid then launched a seeker at Terminator. He knew it wouldn’t hurt Terminator that much, but it can knock him pretty far with the force of the explosion. Terminator was launched into the air by the seeker, and then he fell. Unfortunately, he wasn’t anywhere near any platform walls, and did not have anything that could help him to one.
Acid, having beaten his opponent, was then warped back to Carrotus.

Ooo... Short. O.o I have to start writing longer chapters...

And don't worry Flint, I'll get you into the next chapter.



I also have I question. Does everyone on the forum like my story, or do the people who don't like it just keep their mouthes shut?