The JJ2+ team is proud to announce that following years of effort and spritework, you will now be able to play as a new fourth rabbit character! Xìnggǎn de Tùnǚláng is a hardworking, demure accountant bunny with fiery red hair, a cool laser sword, and no pants. Her double jump move has her rotate briefly in midair then slash forwards with her sword, eliminating all enemies in front of her, and her special crouch attack has her say one of several recorded lines that suggest she is open to pursuing a romantic relationship with you (but only if you make the first move, she’s not pushy).
To unlock Xìnggǎn, you will need to save up new rainbow gems by playing matches in Battle3, Battle4, Capture3, Happy Semiconductor CTF, and… nope, that’s the full list. You can earn up to four rainbow gems a day, but if you miss a day, you lose half your gems. Once you accumulate ten gems, you’re ready to press a button to add Xìnggǎn to your game forever (0.65% chance of success, 99.35% chance of getting some extra TNT ammo instead).
Or you could pay us $30 to press the button ten times, but, you know, the choice is totally up to you!
Xìnggǎn will only be available for two weeks before another new featured character takes her place, Vazz Vaccrabbit, a gnarly cool dude who’s gonna teach kids that it’s totally radical to get vaccinated, followed a couple weeks later by Mario’s Undead Corpse. We expect this new JJ2+ update to be available for download soon, we sent it through the Suez Canal to speed things up.
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Eat your lima beans, Johnny.