Just like back in the pre-Win3.1 days...

[Violet CLM]

"Why do you want to shoot someone as unthinking and likable as myself?"

[Radium]

<b>"We just don't like people," he replies.</b>

[Violet CLM]

"But I'm a rabbit, and I know a Minion!"

[Radium]

<b>"Rephrase - we just don't like anything that moves." he adds.</b>

[Violet CLM]

"But you're always moving! And why aren't you off hunting Trafton or someone?"

[Radium]

<b>The merperson turns around and blasts another merperson to pieces. "Most of the time we just put up with eachother."</b>

[Violet CLM]

Tell other Merpeople "Hey! This guy just killed one of your kind. You should stop him before he kills you, too!".

[Radium]

<b>Merperson shoots you. Game loaded.</b>

[Strato]

play a round of Faw Rad wars

[Radium]

<b>http://www.foxmage.com/RadFaw.zip
RadFaw Wars, the one with the bigger characters. A bunch of MB, and you probably already have it.</b>

[Blackraptor]

Walk into the Trafton cave, start acting like you had a bit too many alchoholic beverages and start singing the elmo theme song repeatedlty.

[Radium]

<b>You are unable to walk into the Trafton Cave because it has this marvelous thing known as a "door". And... Elmo has a theme song?

My page.</b>

[Violet CLM]

Can the skateboard be used underwater?

[Radium]

<b>That would depend what you're using it for.</b>

[Violet CLM]

Riding around at high speeds.

[Radium]

<b>Er... despite what Spongebob Squarepants has told you, finless creatures moving quickly underwater is generally impossible.</b>

[Violet CLM]

"Generally". Can Foo?

[Strato]

Actually, I didn't have that version of the faw rad wars...

[Radium]

<b>No, it's just hard to move quickly in water without fins.</b>

[Strato]

How many versions of faw rad are there?

[Radium]

How many versions of faw rad are there?
<b>There's the old one that ran in 640x480 and had the cool music and the new one that runs in 1024x768. I think there were several versions of the old one, with minor changes.</b>

[Violet CLM]

Give Foo skateboard as shield.
Tell Foo to wander around making the Merpeople shoot their fellow Merpeople.

[Strato]

Unknown is getting close to beating me for 2nd place. Time to become active again. What paths havn't we been down yet?

[Radium]

<b>You give Foo the skateboard and tell him to make the Merpeople shoot eachother. He comes running back about a minute later. The skateboard has been destroyed but no Merpeople have.

The only path you have not been down is past the Chaos Ward. In other news, the Cyber Cafe computer is back online, and I'm sure the rest of your party has gotten pretty bored.</b>

[Violet CLM]

According to my map, every location has been found except any behind the Chaos Ward, and only two places are in the exact same spot.

[Violet CLM]

Wait. Lasers... skateboards.. what kind of lasers?

[Radium]

<b>The kind of lazers that make stuff go "boom" and "sizzle" and make people dead.

Invintory:
-Wings
-Thirdeighteennoteevenbetterflyingfullyclotheductsc raptlegalfourseatsestrudelire
-Chaos Grapes (in throat)
-Noberries (6)
-Dollar
-Pandora's Car Keys (2)
-Crystal
-Chaos Oil
-Chaos Cord
-Fawfaw's Special Recipe Nocake (Item Lock)
-Wafflepieces
-Snufuss Cloak
-Xion
-Lacrosse Stick of Doom
-Druid Robe
-Sea Lemon</b>

[Violet CLM]

Take skateboardpieces.

[Radium]

<b>There are none.</b>

[Violet CLM]

Ask Merpeople if they would like to sell/trade for one of their laser guns. Promise to make things no longer move with it.

[Strato]

...that sounds dumb. Are you really out of idas ur?

[Violet CLM]

Trafton killed Foo and must be punished!


...plus Uberbob has this tradition of leaving nobody alive who is neither invisible nor in the party.

[Strato]

good point.

[Radium]

Ask Merpeople if they would like to sell/trade for one of their laser guns. Promise to make things no longer move with it.
<b>HAHAHAHHHAAHNO.

Far away at the Trading Post, Araches punches Faw out of boredom.</b>

[Violet CLM]

Ask Merpeople if they would reconsider their answer.
Offer Foo.

[Strato]

Control : Inf. Spaz
Go : Faw
Puch faw as well.
Go : Spot place

Control : Unber Bob
Ask for magic gremlin guru to appear again.

[Radium]

<b>The Merpeople clearly don't want to negotiate(sp?). Even for Foo.

There is no Infinite Spaz here and Uberbob can not "summon" the Gremlin Guru.</b>

[Strato]

Dran.

Go back to the avatar of death.
Analyze it.

[Radium]

<b>You look at the Avatar of Death. The stonehenge-like structure has no sign of life anywhere near it. A bloody knife chained to a stone table inside seems like it would be used in some sort of sacrifice ritual.</b>

[Strato]

I think we should leave. Quietly. Back and investigate the Lifeatar.

[Radium]

<b>You leave to investigate the "Lifeatar". It too resembles a stonehenge-like structure, except a purple drapery hangs above a marble fountain. It doesn't look very evil or dangerous at all.</b>

[Violet CLM]

Examine draping.

[Radium]

<b>It's like cloth and it's purple. No machine guns are hidden in it.</b>

[Strato]

Lift up the drapery.

[Radium]

<b>You lift it up. The foutain is behind it.</b>

[Blackraptor]

Lift up the fountain.

[Radium]

<b>You can't lift the foutain because it's taped down.</b>

[Blackraptor]

Use the bloody knife and perform a ritual.

[Radium]

<b>The knife is at the Avatar of Death, and you don't know any celtic rituals at the moment.</b>

[Violet CLM]

Take drapery.

[Radium]

<b>Taped that one there too.</b>

[Strato]

Why are the celtic?

Page claim

[Violet CLM]

Go to Chaos Ward.
Go up to surface.
Move forwards.
Go back down.
Steal page.

[Radium]

Why are the celtic?
Sigworthy.

<b>You go up to the surface using the Chaos Cord, as usual. You move forward, but slowly slide back as you descend back to the ground.</b>

[Blackraptor]

Attempt to create some sort of item by fusing together the Snuffus cloak and Pandora's car keys.

[Strato]

Only 1 key will be used in the fusion.

[acid]

Search_help("Winning the game")

[Radium]

<b>Invintory:
-Wings
-Thirdeighteennoteevenbetterflyingfullyclotheductsc raptlegalfourseatsestrudelire
-Chaos Grapes (in throat)
-Noberries (6)
-Dollar
-Pandora's Car Key
-Crystal
-Chaos Oil
-Chaos Cord
-Fawfaw's Special Recipe Nocake (Item Lock)
-Wafflepieces
-KeyInACloak
-Xion
-Lacrosse Stick of Doom
-Druid Robe
-Sea Lemon

The rest of your party (Araches, L33tz4n, Faw, and Shuriken) search for "Winning the Game". 152043 results, most of which are related to Final Fantasy CXCIV (the newest one!).

Hey, I just noticed that you split up your party according to gender.</b>

[acid]

>_<

Search_help("Winning this game")
Search_help("Winning this dumb game")
Search_help("Winning the game Just like back in the pre-Win3.1 days...")
Search_help("Winning Just like back in the pre-Win3.1 days...")

and if all else fails...

Bludgeon Radium with Steel Pipe Of Dishonor.

[Radium]

<b>Radium has been bludgeoned. Heh... bludgeon... that sounds like a planet. You know what a funny word is? MegaRaisin. Haha. Funny!</b>

[Violet CLM]

Hey, I just noticed that you split up your party according to gender.
That's almost an insult... except it's not really... gah. You probably shouldn't have said it, though.

Search for ""Winning the Game" -CXCIV-" (I'm guessing this will make 'CXCIV' become quite important sometime later on)
Add Lemon to Thirdeighteennoteevenbetterflyingfullyclotheductsc raptlegalfourseatsestrudelire.
Climb over Chaos Ward.

[Radium]

<b>You get plenty of results for Final Fantasy CXCIII.

Invintory:
-Wings
-Thirdeighteennoteevenbettercitrusfruityflyingfully clotheductscraptlegalfourseatsestrudelire
-Chaos Grape (in throat)
-Noberries (6)
-Dollar
-Pandora's Car Key
-Crystal
-Chaos Oil
-Chaos Cord
-Fawfaw's Special Recipe Nocake (Item Lock)
-Wafflepieces
-KeyInACloak
-Xion
-Lacrosse Stick of Doom
-Druid Robe

Pronounced: third - a - TEE - no - tee - vin - bet - ter - sit - ris - froo - tee - fly - ing - ful - lee - cloth - duct - scrapt - lee - gall - four - seat - ses -trudel - ire. 26 syllables.</b>

[Violet CLM]

Is there any obvious way to move the Chaos Cord to the other side of the Chaos Ward?

[Radium]

<b>No.</b>

[Violet CLM]

Eat Noberry.

[Radium]

<b>Your left leg is now a soda can.</b>

[Blackraptor]

Vomit out noberry.

[Radium]

<b>It has already been digested.</b>

[Violet CLM]

Eat another.

[Radium]

<b>Uberbob has gone deaf, blind, numb, and lost his senses of taste and smell.</b>

[Blackraptor]

Attempt to eat the Lacrosse Stick of Doom.

[Violet CLM]

Wait about ten minutes.
Eat another!

[Radium]

<b>You are unable to eat the LSOD. Instead, you eat another Noberry. Uberbob has developed an immunity to pie.</b>

[Violet CLM]

Eat Noberry. (...yes, I am trying to get a specific result here)

[Radium]

<b>You eat another one. You briefly feel warm inside, like you would've caught on fire if you weren't underwater.</b>

[Blackraptor]

Can you use the wings to fly over the chaos ward?

[Radium]

<b>You have already determined that if you fly over it you are pushed back as you go back down.</b>

[Violet CLM]

Eat Noberries (and reload the game when you run out) until you turn Invisible.

[Radium]

<b>Wow, you happen to turn invisible!</b>

[Violet CLM]

Mug Merperson for Laser Gun.
Take Laser Gun.
Return to Chaos Ward.
Shoot Carving.

[Radium]

<b>You manage to take a lazer. It's ammo screen goes blank, displaying the words "enter password".</b>

[Violet CLM]

Return to surface.
Ask L33tz4n for help with the password.

[Radium]

<b>You ask L33tz4n for the password. She examines the laser, and tells you that it'll take a few hours to h4Xor. She asks if you found anything interesting in Lower Placespot.</b>

[Violet CLM]

"Well, there were these avatars... a Temple of the Gerbil, a creature named Trafton, lots of weird structures, and these merpeople who looked kind of like you but weren't nearly so nice..."

[Radium]

<b>"Avatars?" she questions.</b>

[Violet CLM]

"Yeah... there was this altar for sacrificing people - that was Death - and a fountain with a purple drapery for Life. All very silent and ceremonial."

[Radium]

<b>"Hmm," she says, "I've he4rd of such things... was there a statue between them?</b>

[Violet CLM]

"Yes. A knight wearing strange armor, in fact."

[Radium]

<b>"Did you see if he had a helmet on, and what was behind it?" she continues.</b>

[Violet CLM]

(Wasn't described...)

Try to remember.

[Radium]

<b>You look around the inside of your mind. Just as you expected, you don't find anything.</b>

[Violet CLM]

Ask Foo.
Claim page.
Draw map of Lower Placespot on back of page.
Offer L33tz4n Pagemap.

[Radium]

<b>Foo is completly oblivious to the world around him. You draw a map and hand it to L33tz4n. She examines it, perticuarly the placement of the Avatars, and asks "Could I p0ssibly take a look?

Invintory:
-Wings
-Thirdeighteennoteevenbettercitrusfruityflyingfully clotheductscraptlegalfourseatsestrudelire
-Chaos Grape (in throat)
-Dollar
-Pandora's Car Key
-Crystal
-Chaos Oil
-Chaos Cord
-Fawfaw's Special Recipe Nocake (Item Lock)
-Wafflepieces
-KeyInACloak
-Xion
-Druid Robe
-Sea Lemon
-Lacrosse Stick Of Doom</b>

[Violet CLM]

Push Chaos Grape further down Foo's throat.
Put the Chaos Grape somewhere away from L33tz4n.

[Radium]

<b>You strategically remove the Chaos Grape from Foo's throat. L33tz4n seems quite unsure about the idea of eating something Foo just regurgitated.</b>

[Violet CLM]

"You don't eat it, you just try to choke on it... I'd wash it, but it probably wouldn't work."

[Radium]

<b>L33tz4n tries not to choke on the grape and chokes on it.</b>

[Strato]

Control L337z4n
Go : L. Place Spot
Go : Statue

[Radium]

<b>Since you're the one with the Chaos Cord, going along might be nice. It's called "planning ahead".</b>

[Strato]

Ok then, we both go. You pay alot of attention to detail don't you?

[Radium]

<b>You and L33tz4n go to the Lower Placespot statue. You notice that it does have a mask, but two hinged face plates, one on the left and one on the right, cover it.</b>

[Violet CLM]

Aaaand what's behind it?

[Radium]

<b>You try to move it. It seems to be stuck.</b>

[Strato]

Invintory check

[Strato]

Invinitory Check

[Radium]

<b>Invintory:
-Wings
-Thirdeighteennoteevenbettercitrusfruityflyingfully clotheductscraptlegalfourseatsestrudelire
-Chaos Grape (in throat)
-Dollar
-Pandora's Car Key
-Crystal
-Chaos Oil
-Chaos Cord
-Fawfaw's Special Recipe Nocake (Item Lock)
-Wafflepieces
-KeyInACloak
-Xion
-Druid Robe
-Sea Lemon
-Lacrosse Stick Of Doom
</b>

[Strato]

Are they locked or do the just not want to move?

[Radium]

<b>L0><0r3d.</b>

[Strato]

Remove key from cloak and attempt to open. if that dosn't work, smack it with the thideighteennote, if that dosn't work, try the pandora key.

[Radium]

<b>You try everything. Nothing works. Sux, no?</b>

[Strato]

Why can't this be easy?

Describe the key hole shape?

[Radium]

<b>There is none.</b>

[Blackraptor]

Look for any weaknesses in the mask.
Attempt to break it open.
Attempt to cast an opening spell.
Attempt to say Big blue bank blacked bucks 5 times in a row without screwing up.

[Radium]

<b>Look for any weaknesses in the mask.
You see none.
Attempt to break it open.
It was evidently not designed to break.
Attempt to cast an opening spell.
You know none.
Attempt to say Big blue bank blacked bucks 5 times in a row without screwing up.
You lose 50 HP.</b>

[Blackraptor]

Attempt to regain 50 HP.

Sing that tounge twister 5 more times out of curiousity.

Attempt to haxor the mask.

Ask L33tz4n for advice.

Criticize her advice.

[Radium]

<b>You mystically gain 50 HP and lose your ability to say tounge-twisters. Determining you can't haxor the mask, you ask L33tz4n for advice. "Well," she says, "I think it might have something to do with the avatars."
"What kind of help is that?" you ask.
"You're the leader. You go try to figure this stuff out," she replies.</b>

[Violet CLM]

Put Sea Lemon on Avatar of Life.
Put Lacrosse Stick of Doom on Avatar of Death.
Return to statue and look curiously at it for signs of change.

[Strato]

Move some of the lifeatars water on to the deathatars dagger.

[Radium]

Move some of the lifeatars water on to the deathatars dagger.
<b>When you're underwater, it can be quite difficult telling where every different water molecule came from.

You put the LSOD on the Death Avatar and the Sea Lemon on the Life Avatar. You look at the statue; nothing seems to have changed.</b>

[Strato]

Look for any buttons or switches on both of the atars.

[Radium]

<b>You don't find anything.</b>

[Strato]

Talk : Rad : Are we even supposed to be caring about this at the moment?

[Radium]

<b>How am I supposed to know what you care about?


(Yes.)</b>

[Strato]

Any inscriptions on either of the atars?

[Radium]

<b>Nay, my weary comrade.</b>

[Strato]

I'm tired?

[Radium]

<b>Naa, it was just the best adjective I could think of to go with "comrade".</b>

[Violet CLM]

Go to Avatar of Death.
Cut Uberbob with knife.
Put blood on altar.
(If nothing happens) return to statue.

[Strato]

uhm, clean off the bloody dagger first. No aids wanted.

[Radium]

<b>Good job, Infinite. You clean off the dagger and put some blood on the avatar. Nothing happens. You return to the statue and notice nothing has changed there either. "Maybe we should just kill you and put you on th3 avatar," L33tz4n suggests. You have a feeling she was joking, but I won't confirm or deny that.</b>

[Strato]

Put blood on atar of life.

[Radium]

<b>You drip some blood on the Avtar of Life. Nothing changes there or the statue, but you have completly ruined the color scheme.

Myyyy paaaaaagge!! *hiss*</b>

[Strato]

Run a quick description of the atars again.

[Radium]

<b>The Avatar of Death is a demonic looking black and red structure with a skull engraved on the top. A table with a bloody knife chained to it rests in the center. A nearby sign reads "Avatar of Death - No littering, please." The Avatar of Life is a structure similar to the other, but a brilliant shade of white and gold with deep blue drapings hung on it. In the middle there's a small foutain (which would probably look much neater if it wasn't underwater). A sign reads "Avatar of Life - No littering, <s>please</s> plzthx."</b>

[Strato]

Litter with dollar.

[Radium]

<b>You throw the dollar down. Nothing happens. You look at the statue. Nothing happened. You pick your dollar back up.

Random Enemy Encounter!!
http://www.foxmage.com/far-east.mid

Merman Blademaster attacks!
Abilities: Defensive Spellcaster, Increased Damage
Mermaid Stormsummoner attacks!
Abilities: Summoning

Blademaster attacks
> Uberbob loses 20 HP
Stormsummoner casts Whirlpool
> Uberbob loses 10 HP
> L33tz4n loses 10 HP

Uberbob: Course of action?
L33tz4n: Course of action? </b>

[Violet CLM]

Uberbob: Football tackle Stormsummoner.
L33tz4n: Summon Water Elemental with explicit instructions to dispose of the attackers.

[Radium]

<b>Uberbob tackles the Stormsummoner
> Stormsummoner loses 15 HP
L33tz4n summons Water Elemental
Water Elemental attacks Blademaster
> Blademaster loses 30 HP
Blademaster attacks
> Uberbob loses 20 HP
Stormsummoner summons Octopus
Octopus attacks l33tz4n
> L33tz4n loses 10 HP
> L33tz4n has been bound in place! </b>

[Violet CLM]

Uberbob: Propose to Octopus.
Water Elemental: Attack again.

[Radium]

<b>Uberbob proposes
> Derby has randomly pwned the octopus for no reason!
> L33tz4n is no longer bound in place
Water Elemental attacks
> Blademaster 30 damage
> Blademaster has fallen!
Stormsummoner casts Darkness Wave
> Uberbob and L33tz4n are blind! </b>

[Grath]

While Battle = 1, Pass
While Battle = 0, determine which way from the statue the lifeatar is.
If Lifeatar = Left, Open left mask on statue.
If Lifeatar = Right, Open right mask on statue.
Else: Force rad to commit suicide.
(Pass means do nothing in Python.)

[Radium]

<b>omb plz reed hole fred plz k thx</b>

[Violet CLM]

Uberbob: Hook Xion up to brain.
L33tz4n: Flail around violently with whip.
Water Elemental: Attack again!

[Blackraptor]

I like the purple. Command Uberbob to always talk in purple.

[Radium]

<b>Uberbob tries to hook Xion to his brain but can't find it! (what "it" refers to is your choice)
L33z4n attacks.
> Stormsummoner loses 15 HP
Water Elemental attacks
> Stormsummoner loses 30 HP
> Stormsummoner has fallen!
> You found Siren's Box

Once the battle is over the Water Elemental is dispelled. You examine the Siren's Box; a small silver box with a golden chain and lock around it and a picture of a seashell carved into the top.</b>

[Blackraptor]

Whats the hardness factor of the box?

[Radium]

<b>8. And it rattles when you shake it (which you probably shouldn't have done).</b>

[Blackraptor]

Attempt to smash it at the mask on the statue.

[Radium]

<b>Neither breaks.</b>

[Strato]

Open box?

[Radium]

<b>The box is locked. And have we forgotten about the Avatars and statue already?</b>

[Strato]

Whats the hole on lock shaped like?

[Radium]

<b>The lock forgot to have a hole. Sucks, doesn't it?</b>

[Strato]

Attempt to knaw open the lock.

[Radium]

<b>You attempt that. It doesn't work.</b>

[Strato]

whoops, meant gnaw.

[Blackraptor]

Take a Rifle and blast the bloody thing open

[Radium]

<b>Even if you had a rifle, how would you operate it underwater?</b>

[Blackraptor]

I WOULD USE MY UBER SPECIAL POWERS AND MAKE IT TURN INTO A RADIOACTIVE BAGEL THEN MAKE IT GO BOOM.

Command UBERBOB to start attacking l33tz4n and Xion

[Radium]

<b>Eeeh.. no. Stick to posing in a swimsuit, BR.</b>

[Blackraptor]

only if I get paid.

Command Uberbob to sing the christmas carol as an attempt to open the box. Sing all 203 versions and find out which works best.

[Radium]

<b>The box is too l33t to be opened by mere unconventional methods.</b>

[Blackraptor]

Get l33tz4n to h4x0r teh box

[Radium]

<b>The box is not electronic.</b>

[Violet CLM]

<b>Even if you had a rifle, how would you operate it underwater?</b>
Well, L33tz4n's supposed to be working on that, but she apparently decided to visit Lower Placespot instead...


Put Sirens' Box on Avatar of Life.
Return to statue.

[Strato]

If dosn't work, try the death atar.

[Radium]

<b>Nothing has changed. You retrieve the box.

Let's review what you havn't done but have tried in LowerPS:

-Avatars and statue
-Mermaids with lasers
-Chaos ward
-Trafton cave
-Temple of the gerbil

Invintory:
-Wings
-Thirdeighteennoteevenbettercitrusfruityflyingfully clotheductscraptlegalfourseatsestrudelire
-Chaos Grape (in throat)
-Dollar
-Pandora's Car Key
-Crystal
-Chaos Oil
-Chaos Cord
-Fawfaw's Special Recipe Nocake (Item Lock)
-Wafflepieces
-KeyInACloak
-Xion
-Druid Robe
-Sea Lemon
-Lacrosse Stick Of Doom
-Siren's Box</b>

[Strato]

how are we supposed to know what to do first?

[Radium]

<b>Thinking, trial, and error. But all things connect eventually.</b>

[Blackraptor]

Go to Trafton cave entrance.

[Radium]

<b>You do that.</b>

[Blackraptor]

Chex0r if Trafton is sleeping or awake.

If sleeping, try quietly sneaking through the door past him further into the cave.

If awake, wait.



Claim0r teh pag0r

[Radium]

<b>Once again, a stationary object named "locked door" impedes your progress.</b>

[Blackraptor]

just break the thong open

Derby: Content removal.

[Strato]

o.O Thong...?

[Grath]

FORCE L337z4n to work on the laser gun.
While she's doing that, check out the cave of the gerbil.

[Blackraptor]

o.O Thong...?

ASDSF$DFDTCFSX%R#EF4rhygfY%TY I meant thing>(

[Radium]

<b>You tell L33tz4n to work on the laser. Leaving her by the path to Trafton's cave, you return to the Temple of the Gerbil. The large stone still blocks the doorway.</b>

[Xion]

hahah...so I'm not the only one with a dirty mind.<Araches in a thong...o.O>

Inventory check
Party Status
Progress Status
Main History: Past 3 weeks

[Radium]

Main History: Past 3 weeks<b>Plz read thread.

Parties:
Uberbob -> Temple of the Gerbil, Lower Placespot
L33tz4n -> Trafton's Road, Lower Placespot
Araches, Faw, Foo, Shuri -> Pandora's Island

Invintory:
-Wings
-Thirdeighteennoteevenbettercitrusfruityflyingfully clotheductscraptlegalfourseatsestrudelire
-Chaos Grape (in throat)
-Dollar
-Pandora's Car Key
-Crystal
-Chaos Oil
-Chaos Cord
-Fawfaw's Special Recipe Nocake (Item Lock)
-Wafflepieces
-KeyInACloak
-Xion
-Druid Robe
-Sea Lemon
-Lacrosse Stick Of Doom
-Siren's Box</b>

[Xion]

Look at box through crystal. (I am guessing that the box is not stone, so whatever is inside should show.)

[Radium]

<b>You look into the box. It contains a short curved knife. Yay for noticing the obvious before anyone else!</b>

[Xion]

!!! THE DAGGER!

But...how/why did it get sealed in a box?

Return to the bookmark (I assume it's still floating) and jump up to the surface. Have the other members attempt to open the box.

[Radium]

<b>Wrong dagger. It's not like there's only one, ya know =P. This one's curved.

I'll tell you ahead of time that the rest of your party can't help. But retrieving the bookmark was a good idea.</b>

[Xion]

Go to Chaos ward.

Touch bookmark to the chaos ward.

[Radium]

<b>You touch the bookmark to the Chaos Ward.</b>

[Xion]

try to move past the chaos ward now.

And also, for argument's sake, the dagger WAS curved, as shown in this (http://www.foxmage.com/MinionAttack.png) picture you drew yourself.

[Radium]

<b>Yeah, well... this one's more curved.

You are still unable to pass the ward. You take the bookmark back. L33tz4n returns, taking a break from H4x0r1ng t3h laser.</b>

[Xion]

analyze lazer
--Look: Any specific marks on it? Writing?

[Radium]

<b>It has a computer screen with numbers and letters on it. No other writing.</b>

[Xion]

<b>It has a computer screen with numbers and letters on it. No other writing.</b>
hmm...Kinda like the rifles from "Halo"?

okay. I see.

See if you can hook Xion up to the laser. Maybe he can temper it and make it not only work, period, but to make it also work underwater. Xion's Dark Meteor is a laser shotgun that he has used in waist-deep water.

[Radium]

Xion's Dark Meteor is a laser shotgun that he has used in waist-deep water.
<b>This is how much I care:

You attach Xion to the lazer and he explodes in a shower of sparks. He was clearly not made for 12v. Oh no, L33tz4n accidently saved the game afterwards, too!

Invintory:
-Wings
-Thirdeighteennoteevenbettercitrusfruityflyingfully clotheductscraptlegalfourseatsestrudelire
-Chaos Grape (in throat)
-Dollar
-Pandora's Car Key
-Crystal
-Chaos Oil
-Chaos Cord
-Fawfaw's Special Recipe Nocake (Item Lock)
-Wafflepieces
-KeyInACloak
-Oven Baked Crispy Xion
-Druid Robe
-Sea Lemon
-Lacrosse Stick Of Doom
-Siren's Box
-Bookmark of Eternity

[Blackraptor]

Can you chew through the box? Can you cut it open with the dagger from the death avtar(sp?)?

[Radium]

<b>No. I'm sure a few pages ago you were looking for something that COULDN'T be destroyed.</b>

[Xion]

hm.

Yeah.

You should have told me the laser was 12v. Xion's shell was built for 8.75v, the natural resonance of D.Xion's body.

Check Xion: LED still blinking? Xion was shocked many many times before, so this shouldn't be too bad, maybe a small loss of photon energy but if we had his origional shell just a moment of standing still would heal that very easily.

Give the laser back to l33tz4n <and promise pancakes after she hacks the laser>.
Analyze: Wafflepieces
Analyze: KeyInACloak
Analyze: Druid robe: Why isn't L33tz4n wearing this?
Analyze: Siren's Box: Any marks on it?

[Radium]

Xion's shell was built for 8.75v, the natural resonance of D.Xion's body. *snip* Xion was shocked many many times before, so this shouldn't be too bad, maybe a small loss of photon energy but if we had his origional shell just a moment of standing still would heal that very easily.
<b>Xion suddenly miraculously combusts and turns into a smouldering pile a ashes. :D You give L33tz4n the lazer and promise her pancakes if she fixes it.

The wafflepieces are pieces of a waffle (no syrup, sry). TheKeyInACloak is one of Pandora's Keys wrapped in the Snufuss Skin. L33tz4n is not wearing the druid robe because it's the one you bought. The Siren's box has a picture of something oceany on it but I forget what and don't feel like looking it up.</b>

[Xion]

<b>Good job, Infinite. You clean off the dagger and put some blood on the avatar. Nothing happens. You return to the statue and notice nothing has changed there either. "Maybe we should just kill you and put you on th3 avatar," L33tz4n suggests. You have a feeling she was joking, but I won't confirm or deny that.</b>
hmm...

<s>Try placing Xion's burnt chip on the altar of death...</s>That was evil.

Control: Xion
Analyze: Surroundings
Control: Gradient
Analyze: Surroundings
Control: Sharkk
Analyze: Surroundings
Control: Dra...

...Ignore that last "control" command.

Control: Upper Party
Analyze: Surroundings
Time Check
Status check
Inventory Check

Control: Lower Party
Analyze: Surroundings

[Violet CLM]

Not a bad idea... sure, put Xion on the altar of death.

Object that can't be destroyed? Under the right circumstances, the Bookmark of Eternity fits that category, but I don't remember what it was wanted for...

Throw Siren's Box at Temple of Gerbil Stone.

[Strato]

...

[Xion]

Waaaaaaaaaaait a minute...

If a lock has no openings in it other than the two holes the loop is in, shouldn't it be unable to be locked and unlocked?

[Radium]

Control: Xion
Analyze: Surroundings
Control: Gradient
Analyze: Surroundings
Control: Sharkk
Analyze: Surroundings
Control: Dra...
<b>Xion's ashes disinigrate into nothingness.

The Siren's Box has a lock chained around it, and the lock's hole was filled in. You throw it at the Gerbilstone. It bounces off. Your upper party is on Pandora's Island. Your lower Party is in Lower Placespot. It's about 3 PM. Hello.</b>

[Xion]

Throughly analyze every object in the lowerplacespot.

Check the ground for random objects.

[Radium]

<b>Just give in and <i>read</i> what you missed, Xion. I'll list the places of intrest:

-Trafton's cave: A cave with a locked door.
-Temple of the Gerbil: A temple with a large rock in front of it's entrance.
-Statue: A masked statue of a knight between the two Avatars.
-Avatar of Life: Nice looking place for a picnic.
-Avatar of Death: Not a nice looking place for a picnic. Sacrificial knife (chained down) here.
-Merpeople with lasers: Nuff said. Guarding a stone box that's in front of a black-hole like thing.
-Chaos Ward: A simple contraption nobody's figured out how to pass yet.
-Arena: A place that served no real purpouse except for giving one pathetic hint.

There are no random pickuooable objects.</b>

[Xion]

Refer to the Strategy guide: What hint was given from the Arena?

Analyze the Chaos Ward deeply:
--What is it enchanted with?
--What could it possibly be made of?
--What marks are on the Chaos Ward itself?

[Radium]

Refer to the Strategy guide: What hint was given from the Arena?
<b>Why should I have to look it up when you're too lazy?

You aren't sure what the Chaos Ward is enchanted with, but you assume it's magic. You aren't sure what it's made of either, but has so far proven indestructable. It has a carving of a flame on it.</b>

[Xion]

Can you touch the ward itself?

[Radium]

<b>Yes. You can even reach your arm past it.</b>

[Xion]

<b>You look around the desered combat arena. You find no interesting items, but an interesting phrase carved into one stone pillar. "Opposites don't attract, they explode."</b>
...Did you plug the negitive charge of Xion into the Negitive charge of the laser?

[Xion]

Can we physically move the ward itself?

[Radium]

<b>Xion was simply overloaded. And no, you can't move the Chaos Ward.</b>

[Xion]

Hrm.

I looked back through the topic (OMG YES I DID!) and noticed that you mentioned the Chaos Ward is made of wood.

Now, follow me here:

If the Chaos Ward is made of wood, it will float. However, if we enchant it to become Chaos Wood, it will sink. But then if we enchant it to repel all Chaos items (I am guessing the grape in the throat) then shouldn't that therefore nullify itself?

Glitch: Chaos Ward

[Radium]

<b>The Chaos Ward is <i>not</i> a chaos item. It is enchanted not to move (like the Bookmark) and to repel chaos items. Nothing can be glitched here, it's all basic enchantment.


Pageclaim.</b>

[Xion]

Tap 1 Mountain
Tap 1 Plains
Play "Disenchant" on Chaos Ward

[Radium]

Tap 1 Mountain
Tap 1 Plains
Play "Disenchant" on Chaos Ward
<b>Er... what?</b>

[Xion]

<img src="http://www.gatheringplacegames.com/Images/Magic/09707.JPG">Tap this...
<img src="http://www.gatheringplacegames.com/Images/Magic/09680.JPG">Tap this...
<img src="http://www.gatheringplacegames.com/Images/Magic/05630.JPG">play this.

Simple.

[Radium]

<b>Hm. That's the reason the non-admins hate you.</b>

[Xion]

funny,

Can I smack the Chaos Ward with the LSOD?

[Radium]

<b>Theoretically, you can smack it with whatever you like. But it won't do anything.

Really, there's only one way to get by this... for now.</b>

[Xion]

hmm...

Shuri can swim, correct? Have him swim down and see if he can go past it. Since he won't have a chaos grape in his throat he would be perfectly fine.

Meanwhile...

Control: Upper party.
Town pipe: Internet Café (fancy!!!)
Go online
Search for "Hunter's Licence Replacement"

[Radium]

Shuri can swim, correct? Have him swim down and see if he can go past it. Since he won't have a chaos grape in his throat he would be perfectly fine.
<b>Her*
Placespot is deep. You can't swim straight down that far without breathing.

You send the rest of your party to the Internet Cafe (unfancy!!!). You do a search for "Hunter's Licence Replacement". All the results are American sites where you can get a terrorist hunting liscense.</b>

[Xion]

darn.

Okay...Do we have some kind of disenchantment spell? (I am guessing that the only other way past it is the rifle itself.)

Try pulling the trigger on the laser, unless L33tz4n is working on it.

[Radium]

<b>You pull the trigger. Nothing happens.

If you hold your breath I'll give you a post limit before you die.</b>

[Xion]

hrm...

Control: Fawriel
Town Pipe: Trading Post
Check items for trade.


...!

SAVE GAME
Inventory Check: How many Noberries do we have?
(BEGIN LOOP)
--If Noberries > 0
----Then eat Noberry.
------If Effect = Gills
--------Then: End loop.
------If Effect ≠ Gills.
--------Then: Repeat loop.
--If Noberries = 0
----Then: Restart with full stock of Noberries.
(END LOOP)

[Strato]

Hold breath.

[Xion]

Hold breath.
Not yet, My idea can last us a bit longer.

[Radium]

<b>Items for Trade:
-Chaos Lightbulb
-Rope
-Lord of the Rings DVD
-Broken Lazer Light
-Pandora's Shoe
-Pandora's Can
-Twenty-Four Leaf Clover
-Bandana
-Basketball
-Pink Gumballs (10)

You have no Noberries because you already ate them all trying to get gills earlier.</b>

[Xion]

inventory check

[Radium]

<b>Invintory:
-Wings
-Thirdeighteennoteevenbettercitrusfruityflyingfully clotheductscraptlegalfourseatsestrudelire
-Chaos Grape (in throat)
-Dollar
-Pandora's Car Key
-Crystal
-Chaos Oil
-Chaos Cord
-Fawfaw's Special Recipe Nocake (Item Lock)
-Wafflepieces
-KeyInACloak
-Druid Robe
-Sea Lemon
-Lacrosse Stick Of Doom
-Siren's Box
-Bookmark of Eternity</b>

[Xion]

look at ward with crystal

[Radium]

<b>You see through the ward. The path continues ahead.</b>

[Xion]

Have Uberbob return to the upper party

control: Faw
Pipe: Place Spot
Get Crystal from Uberbob
Pipe: internet Café
Go: Orb room
Transpose the Crystal for the Orb
Pipe: Place Spot
Give Orb to Uberbob

Control: Uberbob
Go: LPS
Go: Ward
Look at Ward through the orb.

Control: Dragon Xion
Check surroundings
Check inventory
Check Stats
Control: Uberbob

[Radium]

<b>You look at the Chaos Ward through the Orb. You see the white outline of it and the objects and structures around it.</b>

[Xion]

Warp past the ward.

Derby: Content clearance.

[Radium]

<b>Warp is a level five Sux Magic spell, therefore you cannot cast it.</b>

Derby: Content clearance.

[Xion]

What is Foo's Sux Magic level?

[Radium]

<b>Foo is capable of casting level one Sux Magic spells.</b>

[Xion]

Control: Dragon Xion (http://www.jazz2online.com/jcf/showpost.php?postid=123679&postcount=58)
Look: Surroundings
Check: Inventory
Check: Status

[Radium]

<b>Dragon Xion is in hell. He is surrounded by darkness. Then satan rips his soul out and sends all traces of him into oblivion. Solved that little problem.</b>

[Xion]

You <i>could</i> have given him a more honorable death, like throwing him off a cliff handcuffed in a barrel.

Anyways, I get the hint of ignoring the ward for now.

SAVE GAME
Go to the Merfolk slowly
Ask "What is in the box and why do you have to protect it?"

[Radium]

<b>Game saved. You and L33tz4n return to the Merpeople, keeping your distance (rememer what happened to the skateboard? Merpeople lazers can toast anything). "What is in the box and why do you have to protect it?" you call out.
"What is within the box and why we must protect it from your kind is not your concern, land dweller," the nearest one replies.</b>

[Xion]

Say "Maybe it is..."
Jingle a set of pandora's keys in the <s>air</s> water

[Radium]

<b>You say "Maybe it is..." and jingle Pandora's Keys. This confuses the Merpeople as much as it confuses me. One of them fires and narrowly misses your head.</b>

[Violet CLM]

Xion, those are car keys.

Ask Merpeople if the reason they dislike living things is that they get dizzy from excessive movement.

[Radium]

<b>"No, we just don't like you," one replies. They shoot a warning shot in your general direction. Talking to them may be unwise.</b>

[Xion]

Ask L337z4n if the laser is fixed.

[Violet CLM]

What colors are the skin and hair of the merpeople?

[Radium]

<b>"Not yet," she explains, "the controls are heavily encrypted. Can't you just get one of your mermaid friends to lend you a laser?"

The merpeople have flesh colored skin and a variety of hair colors. No, these aren't the demonic mermaids from Harry Potter.</b>

[Xion]

Roll your eyes.

what mermaid people? there's only merfolk here.

...we saved, right?

Grab a merfolk from behind, mug him, chop his hand off with the LSOD, and use his hand to shoot the laser.

[Radium]

Grab a merfolk from behind, mug him, chop his hand off with the LSOD, and use his hand to shoot the laser.
<b>Game loaded. =D</b>

[Violet CLM]

I was merely wondering if L33tz4n could pass for a merperson.

Say "Actually, I can't get the merpeople to be my friends. And they don't seem to be willing to give us any lasers, either. Sorry." to L33tz4n.
Completely miss any hidden meaning behind the words "mermaid friends".


(Do your Lacrosse sticks cut people into pieces? Mine can't...)